The Chainsmoker Chronicles

Chill Out

2010-08-13T08:21:00.003-05:00

Waking up from last night's events made me realize something. This something being one of the coolest things I've experienced in my short twenty-two years on this planet.

I went to a concert down in St. Louis last night featuring XV, Donnis, and Chiddy Bang. With that being said, of course they killed the show. Murdered. Annihilated. So on, so forth. But what made last night so damn cool was the surprise of seeing, sitting with, and picking the brains of each of these artists.

They were completely relaxed and chilled out. Spoke with the fans, took pictures, then took the time out to relax with us. I must say I was amazed, and with it the experience quickly shot to the top of my list of awesome. Needless to say, it is bar none the best concert I've ever attended.

Best part of the night aside from one of the baddest broads in the venue inching up on me and trying to get me to take her home? I'd have to say when XV took all his photos with the few fans outside, walked over to my table, shook my hand, and proceeded to sit down and talk with me and a few of my boys for 15 minutes. Yes, it was that subtle. And yes, it was that fucking amazing.

Much love to these guys, keep doing your thing.

"Don't you feel so awesome?"

Oh, How I Lie...

2010-07-19T04:06:00.004-05:00

It's been a while, forgive me. If you would just listen for a moment, let me explain my absence. Don't be too critical.

A lot has happened since my last update, and to be completely honest it may be a tad too uninteresting and much to detail in this singular conversation with you. Everything between major fuck ups, broken relationships, reformed loves, leaps of maturity, and throws of intellectual growth all lent their hand to me shying away from this site. Maybe I shouldn't have left. In all honesty, I don't believe anyone still checks this. And if they do, it may be through blogger's random blog functionality. But that's fine, as long as you enjoy yourself when you read through what I've written.

Long story short, I've missed having an outlet for myself to let loose. Friends can only do so much. Family is the same, as well as with the women. So I'll be back more frequently. I just hope the sentence I just typed isn't a complete lie to myself.

As I'm extremely exhausted, and need sleep for my class in the AM, I'll leave you with this.

I have missed you much, don't fret love. I'm back.

Not Coming Back

2010-01-16T23:14:00.002-06:00

Refer to the new "blog".
Fin~

Imperial Rain (Do NOT Read)

2009-11-18T00:07:00.002-06:00

Imperial Rain

Imperial Rain, published in Science Illustrated's Nov./Dec. 2009 edition, details how a cave in central China provided information that helped explain the rises and falls of dynasties within. In short, a geochemist of the University of Minnesota (Hai Cheng), analyzed rock formations in the Wanxiang cave in the Ginsu province of China. Cheng and his party of researchers from native Chinese universities such as Lanzhou, Nanjing Normal, and the Chinese Academy of Sciences; discovered the chemical composition of a stalagmite in the Wanxiang cave recorded the periodic variations in precipitation over the last 2,000 years in that area. This being important due to the fact stalagmites and stalactites are formed through dripping rain water (from above through the ground) in caves, and the residue of calcium carbonate residue left behind. For this reason, stalagmites and stalactites are accurate archives for precipitation.

The specific Wanxiang stalagmites Hai Cheng discovered had very distinct characteristics. These characteristics included a high growth rate and a high ratio of elements used to date cave formations. The identifiers this sample held could be used to discover more information about the summer monsoons, rainfall, and times of drought in China's history. Using the data found with the stalagmite sample, Cheng was able to confirm three of five dynasties collapsed after decades of "poor" rain seasons. Even so, he also confirmed one of the most prosperous times in China's history (during the reign of the Northern Song dynasty) corresponded with 1,000 years of ample precipitation rates.

In all, this research not only went on to prove and confirm some of the mystery as to why there were declines in China's history... but also helped to support research of other civilizations in other regions of the world. Finding declines in civilizations due to weather is intriguing research. Whether the factors most prominent are temperature or precipitation, both can lead to detriments in a nation's well-being.

While reading through this article, I was not very captured by the author's prose. Even then, I am not even sure who wrote this piece as there is no indication as to who produced it.

The hook was quaint, and told the back story of the lead researcher (Cheng). This set up more slight back story as to China's history and their dynasties. As the author began explaining scientific processes such as precipitation variations seen in stalagmites/stalactites, and low-pressure systems creating monsoons; the article became quite interesting. The author then countered the fascinating part of the article with a Bible-esque run-down of the dynasties (descendants), and "brief" explanations of what happened to each. This was only ended by a subpar conclusion detailing reasons as to WHY the summer monsoons in China have been deteriorating... but only as theories. This single factor brought the entire article down, in my opinion. Paired alongside slightly repetitive storytelling and a lacking vernacular, I view the article as average after the interest.

I Can't Feel My Face

2009-11-02T09:55:00.004-06:00

I lied, I fucking can. The numbness has worn off. I actually probably need some vicodin. I mean... after I finish up the final draft of this paper that I THINK is due at 6 PM tonight. I'm seriously debating not going at all. Then again, I need to. Man, fuck wisdom teeth. This feeling is very awkward and unsettling. Maybe not as bad as someone else's perspective of awkward... but I don't like it.

Help me, someone.

I'll get more in depth later on, when I don't feel like ripping out these stitches. It really is as bad as they say. Like when women have five kids and they can't remember what the pain was like the FIRST time when describing it to a new mother. "Oh yeah, the pain isn't that bad." Well, with wisdom teeth, day three is the worst. Lord help you if you ever get all four cut out at the same time... Though, in that light. I wish I had more of that nitrous.

P.S. it's been three days.

Reclaim & Relive

2009-10-25T22:24:00.004-05:00

Main Entry: re·claim
Pronunciation: \ri-ˈklām\
Function: transitive verb
2 a : to rescue from an undesirable state; also : to restore to a previous natural state

Feels a bit important to start off with that definition. I've been feeling as if my mind has ran away from me, at least as of late. So much to do with so little time. Albeit, work or classes. Maintaining connections with people I have grown wary of, or seeing a family member through a sickness. It almost feels as if I want what I can't have, and have what I don't want. Responsibility is no problem, it is moreso the weight it presents your fragile shoulders as the mass beings to amplify as you find time to actually relax and reflect. But that is for another entry. No time for pity parties. Things always change, soon my situation may take a turn for the better.

Main Entry: re·live

Pronunciation: \(ˌ)rē-ˈliv\

Function: transitive verb

: to live over again; especially : to experience again in the imagination

With the subtle amount of time I have been able to apply to the thought & meditation processes, this word trends alongside them. If I could do THAT differently... If I could have say something differently to her... If I didn't completely steer my goals off the road... Something like that. I feel strange for having those thoughts. I mean, I'll never be able to "redo" any major part of my life. I guess it's just a hypothetical standpoint. Life is a blessing or a bitch. Maybe dreaming doing the right thing is good for someone? Or just a sick realization that things have not been as positive as they could be.

Lol, a tad somber. I apologize. I know about 0-2 people still use blogger so it doesn't actually matter too much. But I'm not trying to soil anyone's mood. So, all I can do right now is think. Maybe about better days, as the light at the end of the tunnel seems a tad far off. Just sayin'.

Much love,

N.A.P.

So Far Gone... For Too Damn Long

2009-05-05T17:03:00.009-05:00

BLOGGER has won back my heart. Tumblr is remedial.

Yo, to be honest, these past few months have been hectic with work, classes, and what not. So this may or may not be convoluted, pending on how "in the mood" I am to write.

BLOGGER, you truly are astounding. I have forgotten about your draft autosave feature. Your easier layout customization options, and your now "txt a blog" addition! You are honestly the best out & the innovator. Now, if only tumblr and twitter would die out... maybe hire an assassin, my love.

HOLD THAT THOUGHT...

I dislike twitter, immensely. But, I have an idea on how to make it interesting. All I need to do is ____, then I can _______, and then ultimately get some enjoyment out of it.

Ehhh, not in the mood anymore. Need to speak with someone upstairs. I shall return to pour my undying love for BLOGGER out in a while (today, I promise).

Long Time Overdue

2009-03-21T18:13:00.004-05:00

But why not waste my time with this blog when I'm going through withdrawals anyway? In truth, I'm tired of alot of people, and much more things. Naw, probably more people. I dislike the fact that I don't work again until April 7th, I don't like my classes, I hate the people that attend those classes with me, I despise people that live on my block, I can't stand 75% of the people that txt me, and I HATE LIARS.

Liars have been becoming rampant lately, and it's annoyingly frustrating. You know who you are, especially if you're reading this. Because chances are, it wouldn't be posted up here if it were for someone else. Either way, if you're a liar... fix it or get out of my life. Because I don't like you, and you obviously don't like me enough to tell me the truth. That, or you don't have the stones to.

Again, I'm going through withdrawals. So I'm experiencing hyper-tension, migraines, extreme drowsiness, and overactive thinking. Still doesn't negate the fact I'm correct about everything I say. Which leads me to say this: If your IQ is less than 120, don't speak to me. Especially if you think Vegas is a "great state" along the lines of California. THEN argue with me that I said it. That's fucking amazing. Almost as amazing as your skull game. Oh, and send my regards to your boyfriend; whom is sticking his tongue down your throat right about now. Bet that tastes great, pause.

Music has been waning lately. I don't understand everyone's fascination with Kid Cudi. He's subpar, boring, and emo-sings like KanYe West now. Oh, now I see why everyone likes him. HARHARHARHARHAR, seems like everyone is a lemming now days. "OH, KANYE WEST LIKES HIM, WE MUST LIKE HIM TOOOOOOOO!" "OH, BUT IT'S DRAKE'S MIXTAPE SO IT'S AUTOMATICALLY GOOD!" "I'M GONNA JUMP OFF THIS BRIDGE BECAUSE T.I. IS GOING TO JAIL ;( !" Please do, please do. If you like Kid Cudi, just exile yourself from my presence. You don't even need to comment this (like you would anyway), just never speak to me again and I'll take notice 10 years down the line. If I even remember your pathetic existence by that time.

CAN'T SPELL OVERREACTING WITHOUT OVARIES.

Women aren't confusing, guys. They're stupid. And until you realize this fact, you will not get anywhere with a woman. Confusion is just a type of fogginess they give off. The only reason they MAKE YOU THINK it's confusing, is because in reality... whatever they're saying is dumber than what a rock could argue/talk about/respond with. Also, rocks don't lie half as often. Though this is expected of women (and I have tuned it out as of a couple years ago), it can sometimes bug the shit out of me. Women that like to lie about the same thing over and over again (see, I strategically ask the status of XYZ every day to see if you're still lying) are interesting individuals. They not only think I am dumber than said rock, like them; BUT they think I believe them. This is very wrong. Just ask the exiled one.

"IT'S NOT EVEN A FUCKING RING, IT'S A SECTOR!"

Three red lights? Don't bullshit me Microsoft. Why did my shit break down on SPRING fucking BREAK while playing matches in Call of fucking Duty 4? Why do I have to towel trick my XBOX 360 to get it to run for a couple hours? Why when I call your customer service, I get the only lady that doesn't know WHAT THE FUCK she's talking about, and tells me I have to pay 120 dollars to get my system fixed because it's a month and a half out of your bullshit warranty? MY SYSTEM ALREADY BROKE DOWN WITH 3 LIGHTS AND YOU FIXED IT, REMEMBER? How about some customer service, dickheads ? Naw, how about you just send the hottest female Microsoft executive to my house, and her new job is just to go down on me every time the fucking product I bought from YOU breaks down despite how many times I send it back to you, and you returning it "fixed". First things first, I'll be duping 'the man' with a broken XBOX 360 very soon.

Maybe it's the withdrawals ? But this was long overdue.

This morning I found a bloody glove in my desk and Jim tried to convice me that I commited murder.

2009-02-27T11:49:00.003-06:00

Thanks babbbyyyy

11:38AM Fri, Feb. 27

From: chipmunky

So, I see he received his game. Though I forgot to get the CE, I am sure he will enjoy it. Lol, wait till he sees what he is getting in a couple months. Surprise, much? SURPRISE FTWWWWW! I think he just might lose his mind about it too. Don't try to send it back, either. Sooooo, this is Mai btw. He asked me to do a little update.

"Yo, do me a favor? Accidently step on your white sunglasses."

I like this Joell Ortiz song. It's hottt. Anywho, what can I say to make this interesting! Oh yeah, went to WWE Raw and ECW this past Monday. Epic show, let me tell you. Then Noah tried to tell me that WWE is homoerotic. Fuck out of here! Not even close, buster. He has text now, so I get to text him allllll through the day. He tries to throw it at me so hard in the text too. He's all flirty with all the smiley faces and such. I think it is purely adorable.

I have a dog! Named Hersheyyyyyy! Oh em gee. He doesn't like my bunny much. Noah told me it would eat him? *cries*. Dogs don't eat bunnies?!

Sexy ass, right? Anywho. Tomorrow, I have class and a final exam! I hope I pass. I am pretty confident that I will. I know! A class on Saturday! It sucks, terribly but it goes by faster than you would think. I am watching ABDC re-runs. I am so upset at the last two crews on Season 3. I want Beat Freaks to win. Noah won't watch it. :( Since the show is all rigged and stuff. Forget ABDC and American Idol, I am waiting on the new season of SYTYCD! Mannn, that is going to be great! I have work in a couple hours, so I am going to go ahead and jump in the shower and get ready! This update was boring but I don't care much.

Quick text conversation.

him: :)

me: what are you smiling at?

him: Nasty soup liking Asians.

ilyvm! Lol @ me about the quote a line from Pulp Fiction. NVM!

Underwhelmed

2009-02-13T16:10:00.003-06:00

Barely got any sleep last night, figuring I did take a long... semi-medium sized nap in the afternoon of Thursday. Spent most of my night listening to some podcasts, doing cardio, and debating whether or not to go to my class today at 9 AM (I chose not to).

Two things I found last night on the base of circumstance.

1. I highly dislike fanboys/fangirls/groupies.
2. Charles Hamilton's newest mixtape offering is reallyx5 good.

I did download Drake's newest around 11 AM today. Listened to it the whole way through as I went to my business meeting for work. I disliked it. There are several reasons which I wrench my face in disgust as I go through this mixtape, but I won't get into that... yes I will. It's personal preference. With 17 tracks on the album, he leaked 7 of them before he dropped the album. That is mistake number 1. Of the 17 tracks on the album, 7 are of him singing. This is mistake number 2. He promised this mixtape to drop on Feb. 12th numerous times, but left the "starving fans" in the dust until Feb 13th. This is mistake number 3.

Don't get me wrong, maybe people are looking for the R&B side of Drake. Well no maybes here, I'm not looking for another R&B crooner. I was not one of those "starving fans", but I do not appreciate when people catch Joe Buddenitis and promise release dates when they can't keep up with them. Otherwise, I liked when Drake had something of substance to talk about on every track he released. Now it's just songs for the bitches. Take it as you will; I dislike it. There are some joints on there in the realm of the lyrical Drake, but those are few & far between on this album. I have no problem with deviating from the norm, but the kid took it too far with the auto-tune KanYe West copycat tattle tale shit. Get back to some Come Winter shit, or gtfo.

Notable tracks are Nov. 18th, Successful, Say What's Real, & The Calm. Everything else is for lack of a better word, different. Like I said, some of the tracks you've heard... 7 to be precise. So when Sooner Than Later, Brand New, & Little Bit come up on the track list it was disappointing. Especially when some of these songs are a year + old. So... if you like Drake for more than what his adoring groupie whores do, the tape will leave you wondering what the fuck happened & got lost in translation. Kinda like it did me.

Different isn't bad, but it is in this context.

In all, that was my day. I do suggest downloading Charles Hamilton's newest mixtape entitled "Well Isn't This Awkward?". It parodies Valentine's Day of sorts, but is very very mellow. I enjoyed it alot. I also encourage you to download and try out Drake's "So Far Gone" joint. You know my opinion of it from earlier statements. Just google either, or go to charleshamilton.blogspot.com & octobersveryown.blogspot.com for the artist's respective mixtape.

Have a great rest of your day. And no supersitious shit please, it's just immature at this point now. I don't play that pussy shit, pussy.

Oh, and I chopped my hair off.

Hope

2009-02-11T10:28:00.002-06:00

If this skinny black magic voodoo African can get on them titties, so can I !

That is all, more updates incoming.

4 Guys, A Game & 53,395 Zombies

2009-01-17T05:09:00.010-06:00

Don't you feel all up in the clouds ?, no smoke
It feels like I'm higher than your life, no toke

Ever wondered to yourself if you could survive a zombie apocalypse ? Well, I have. I would hold no remorse if my family turned into zombies and I had to cap them in the brain. If a fellow survivor was pinned down, I would save my own ass. Selfish it may be, but I figure I have a good chance of repopulating humanity with a hot chick. If not... should've helped that nigga.

Anywho... I have proven I can survive a zombie apocalypse.

"HOWSO?!", you may ask.

Me and my cohorts have just completed the mega ultra zombie game of the century, on the hardest difficulty. Though we never left each other for dead, and never turned tail in a fight; we survived. And with that, I would like to make a toast. Because not only is a 5:07 AM victory filled with hatred and scorn for the slight flaws we have for each other when we spend upwards of 5 hours talking... but is also filled with cheers of glee that we have finally proven ourselves in the most respectful challenge to grace our eyes and minds within the past 10 years of our lives.

So, let us take a bow !

Dulan. Shut the fuck up when you're talking to me. Shooting me in the calf for the better of the team isn't going to cut it after 1:30 AM. Otherwise, I hate you for making me laugh to the extent I accidentally swung the shotgun around and capped Julius and Rich in the head. It wasn't funny at the moment... but for an hour after it was. Cheers!

Richfagrich. I dislike your niggerness and gay BLUE STEEL poseface in this picture (due to him not being photographed often in the wild), but everything else is A+. 1/4th of the squad, but all of the heart. And half of the fat. Son, if you ever, ever, ever make me stay up this late again over.... naw fuck it. It was worth it. Cheers x2!

"Yo, I wish Left 4 Dead had a tutorial on how to kill Boomers, specifically for Julius...". "I wish I had a tutorial on how to tell you to stop dating psychos." :'(
Yo, you are my niggggga to the end son. Even though we joke all the fucking time over serious shit, we know the boundaries. Glad you're around, b. 1/4th, but all dumbass. Gotta love Filipinos. Cheers x3!

Cheers to myself, by being the funniest & by far most coordinated of the four. With a 52% accuracy rating, and impeccable timing for sarcastic humor... I'm the shit. Not to mention staying up 5 hours with three near intolerable niggas for 4 nights straight. I mean, three including me. Julius isn't a nigga, he's a chink. Cheers x4!

May every one of our pains be champagnes !

In all, what did we accomplish other than more bonding now that we're all split up ? Why good sirs & siresses (lol ???), we beat Left 4 Dead on EXPERT difficulty. And BOY do I have stories, my grandkids will thank me for this 40 years down the line. I swear they will. They have a zombie horde genocidist in their bloodline, their show & tell would rock. Oh how I wish I had a camera for these late night conversations, play sessions and rants of jokes.

Even if our adrenaline dies untimely
Naught ever will our pride, b.

****I can survive Zombie Apocalypses, you can not.

She Came Back For Me... Flaunting Her Body On TV !

2009-01-16T00:08:00.010-06:00

Baby... where you been at ?
I feel like this may very well be a relapse !

So, I got home today at 9 PMish, and the first call I receive even before I get something to eat is from your favorite Vietnamese girl... the dreaded Mailoptocus Rex.

"TURNITONMTVAMERICA'SBESTDANCECREWISONNNN!"

But before all that, hello world. Back to classes once again if people didn't notice. All pre-law this semester, so I'm in my comfort zone. Got released from work, it matters not. I'll be back to work in March, just need some new grounds to settle on. May do some freelance work for the military base again. Other than that, I'm good! What has the world been up to ? Haven't talked to most of you in an eon's span of length. Too bad, your loss.

By the way, the quote above was a run-on sentence just like how it's typed. She has an amazing chink way of doing that sometimes... most times.

So, mad reluctant... I turned on the TV about 10 minutes into the show with Mai screaming in my ear as I ate. Shit was trash. I could've swore I said I was boycotting this show.

Oh yeah, I did.

http://similartobeinghazed.blogspot.com/2008/08/long-live-src.html

So, as I am sitting here sinning against my deal with God, I see no other than Dominic and fucking Hok from So You Think You Can Dance. If this show isn't rigged b, if it isn't fucking rigged. It's like c'mon. After their lil' QUEST performance (which was dope), Shane didn't even acknowledge that he knew the two guys. In fact, he didn't even act like he's TAUGHT them. But whatever. However ABDC wants to front this shit. It's really a bunch of bullshit. On epic proportions.

I watched this whole stupid season premiere, when I KNOW I have class tomorrow at 9 AM, with nothing more than a head hung low in shame & an Asian all in my ear telling me how great this show is. Boo, nigga, boo. Until the final crew grazed the stage.

Oh Kristine baby, where have you been ?

My niggas Team Millenia is backkkkk, son. I have been rolling with them since Season 2. And I'll be going to the grave with them as well. Their style is unorthodox, and it'll be a shame when they finally leave the show. Because they really deserved to be on last season and win, honestly.

Not to mention, Kristine is gonna birth my babies. I am not joking in any way, shape, or form. I'm going to fuck her raw, and she's gonna have my kid in her uterus for 9 months. I see you with your stank eye, cut that out. You must be mad.

I'm running with them the entire season. If you're jockin', you're jockin'. But I've been on their side since a year ago. Even though this show is rigged, these niggas are the dopest. Chill on your speculation, yeen heard right if you think female "B-Girls" are gonna take this home. QUEST even before them.

So, as I back out for the night let me say this...
Fuck it, the video speaks for itself.

God damnit, they're STILL a problem.

Nahmeannnnnnnn ?!

WTF Am I Supposed To Do ?

2009-01-07T05:40:00.011-06:00

5:40 AM

Been up all night, since about 11 AM yesterday. 2009 isn't looking promising at all as of yet. The only things I've had come my way is a bi-polar white girl that attends my sister college, my final check from Toys 'R' Fuckin' Us, and some new boxes of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

On the real, I don't see everyone's infatuation with white women. I mean, I could understand if the chick were cool & shit, but shorty seems over the top. Not to mention, the last two white girls I've spoken to have had hints of racism in their speech & phrases. Then again, they're talking to me. Contradiction or do they think they can bleach my skin ?

Through the night I've done nothing but talk to said chick, talk on the phone for a short stint with a woman who may be going to jail soon, and watch some movies on some nigga nigger nigga bootleg shit. Yes Man, Seven Pounds, & The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. By far, Brad Pitt wins. Yes Man is nothing but Bruce Almighty with a new premise. & Seven Pounds is about Will Smith committing suicide and giving his organs to people who are deserving because he feels guilty for his wife's death (plus SEVEN others). Did I mention I was going to spoil the movie ?

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!

The Button jawn was hot though, more of a "new" Forrest Gump. I read the book though, and of course they left some details out. Well, let me rephrase... the book/short story is MAD different from the movie. The movie was modernized, obviously. Check out the book though, F. Scott Fitzgerald is that nigga. I didn't like his other book though with the crazy white girl. That 'The Great Gatsby' shit.

6:01 AM

I just realized I'm the best writer you all have a pleasure of being in direct contact with. When I have written joints lately like; G.I.M., Mistaken Identity, or My Name Is...; it is easy to see I could've went a different route with my life. Like a different major maybe. But with no further ado, an excerpt from G.I.M.

"I'm starting to think I need a change of plans right along
With everything else, the phone number has been the same for too long
I just got a call from my ex girl, I let her hit the voice mail
I told my next girl I'm gone, but she tries to make it a choice still
The girl I'm with now is here until March
Little does she know... when Spring comes she'll know how a divorce feels"

Please, no autographs after 5 AM. There are times like this when I wish I still had musical connects in the city. Dru lives in NY, and while he COULD send me tracks to record over, I still don't have a mic. Either way, I have all the beats in mind (a joint by Ben Benjamin is PERFECT for the close). It all comes in time though, I have a crazy amount of expenses as of the past couple of months with the way my luck has been running. Just have to maintain.

"'Cause no, I don't have cornrolls or hood tattoos;
But, I can fuck up any track that I rap to ."

I do have new mindsets though. And with everything that has happened, it's enlightened me to a new extent. I don't believe in New Year's resolutions. People shouldn't change just because there is a new numeral on the end of the 4 digit year. I'll be doing the same thing I have been doing, because everything changes in due time.

I do plan on something different though, and that's using uTorrent much more.

6:10 AM

Hah, anyway. This is just a slight update. Though more of a update than my last. You can understand, I wasn't in the mood. Oh, and if you have AIM, I'd suggest hitting me up there. That's where I'm most readily available. Just drop your SN in the comment box, and I got you. You'll know it's me when you see the screen name.

Otherwise, peace be to you.

& My Name Is. . .

Fuck Christmas

2008-12-24T01:28:00.003-06:00

There is too much to speak on. But it is 1:30 in the morning, I have work at 7 AM, and it is "Christmas Eve". I just got off the phone with my insurance company and finished some chain smoking.

If you want to know the full story NOW, ask Aaliyah.

Otherwise, I shall return.

12/28/08**

Fuck it, in short:

Car accident.
New car bought.
Court costs.
Traffic school.
Court fine.
New tires on the new car (long story).
New window frame & window on the new car.
New car got broke into.
500$+ worth of shit stolen out of the car.
Semester grades.
Seasonal work over.
Best Buy not hiring until Feb. (fucking SM lied to me).

That be the gist of it.

You got the cliff notes.

Otherwise, 2008 shaped up to be another shitty year. Cheers to knowing 2009 will follow suit. Clank your glasses now nigga, because I'm drinking enough tonight to last me until 1/2/09. Nah'mean ?

NON-FICTION.

"The Itis"

2008-11-27T21:01:00.004-06:00

Can't believe I was ever in love with. . .
Must've been dusted. . .
After all these years!
They haven't done you ANY justice. . .

As I begin, I know there's been somewhat of hiatus...

There have been alot of instances occurring, and for that I apologize. Minor joints like the re-execution of certain individuals; all the way to totaled cars and verbal wars. Whether minor or major, they are all emotionally draining. And when I'm emotionally siphoned, I am not the best person to write about such & such. Which is fine, it's all fine.

As a backdrop... it seems certain individuals are using their wordplay to get attention. Amazed me at first, but then I realized those individuals have a history of doing so. They're dead & gone. Women fall prey to this and act naive. They are demolished. Some of my circle has gotten rowdy. I've had to check them. Some of my past affairs have resurfaced to do nothing but mere emotional damage. They have been excommunicated. And finally, family has doubted me (that is not new). They are easily ignored.

There are plenty other instances, but I shall spare you. This is a day for gratitude. And as this day winds down, the majority of the acquaintances have relinquished their duties to their families and traveled back to (NYC, FL, LAX, & CHI) pay tribute. This is undoubtedly overdue. Though there is a sense of loss of not having anyone to chill with over this LONG break, it is ultimately understandable.

So to Mike, Drake, Dungie, Ivan, Andre, Dulan, Derek, M. Ac!, Ryan, Tony, D'Andre, Moses, Thomas, Julius, Ant, Brian, Jeff, Will, Brandon, Sean, and a FEW others; thank you. Not only have you held these sacred positions in my mind as friends for the LONGEST time, but you've helped me through some shit. Likewise I with you, but still... it is much appreciated. Much laughter, war, and peace in the future for us all. May our only pain be champagne, and in Dulan's case be it vodka.

All of you women... thanks for the attention you used to give me. There were times with each and every one of you in which your individuality shined. And there were also times in which you each taught me a different lesson about a woman's mental. Either way, there is always love there for that. There are times I wish I could rewind time and employ what I now know to make things better, but those are only wishes. Genies aren't ficticious, just the expectations and hopes for what could've been. Cheers to you.

And lastly; the reflection eternal. There have been many a time in which I've walked outside under the twilight, looked up at the stars, and wondered. Just being random with my thoughts, they helped to clear many of the clouds. With my addictions in hand, and nothing else on my mind but tangled thoughts... it's been a long road in retrospect. From lost daughters to near death experiences. From relocations across the globe, to reformations of old friendships. From grudges being held for decades, to coming to forgive but NEVER forget. I've grown. And when I look at myself in the mirror, I'm complacent. Proud? No, not yet. Give it two more years and I'll be close. All I have to say now is to come winter, and hope the next endeavor falls in love easily with a half-italiano nigga.

Whew.

Otherwise, that'll be that. With work tomorrow, the crew for the most part in NYC with family and relaxing over at Jeff's pad, I'll be taking my leave from blogspot until a little later on. School work is precedent, and needs to be accomplished so I make sure everything is set in stone for EVERYTHING to progress on time. In a drowsy state, I must retire for the night at the very least.

With your throat parched, and your glass stagnant... a toast. Here's to another year of survival! With many more to come in good time.

-raises glass

What am I thankful for ?
My EXPERIENCES.

Let that marinate.

I Hate Lucy

2008-11-14T15:19:00.003-06:00

I can't even call her Lucille anymore. . .

A horrible way to start off the weekend is the best feeling in the world.

As I run this down, keep in mind this is completely my "bias". As everyone has their own version of the events that occurred, I am sure the officer and the individual in standing with me during this scene have their own as well. But, here it goes.

I woke up around 8:53 AM later than I usually do, and took a quick 10 minute shower. Cleaned up a little around my room after I got dressed, and bounced. Immediately noticed the drizzling rain as I walked out of the house and flipped my hood up. Approached Lucille, started her up, kissed the steering wheel in my ritualistic manner, and drove off toward class. I was listening to my audio CD of this book, and had just turned off to the exit into Granite City. Cool, right ? I'm about 10 minutes away from the university at this point, and it is about 9:45 AM. My class begins at 10:00 AM, so I am making good time.

I am driving down Route 162 all the way to the end, to the intersection of 162 and Route 157. There is a stop sign. There are two lanes facing 157, a left hand turn lane and a right hand turn lane. I was in the left hand turn lane preparing to turn left. Traffic on 157 does not stop at this 3-way intersection, so people turning onto 157 must be cautious.

About 50 yards down 157 to my left is a stop LIGHT. It had just turned green and the line of three cars was SLOWLY accelerating. I looked to the right and no cars were coming. Looked again to my left to gauge where those accelerating cars were, then looked to my right again. No cars were coming. So I turn my left and begin accelerating toward the stop light in which is still green at this point. At about 40-45 MPH (on this 55 MPH road) and about 30 yards from where I turned I hear a honk, a screech of tires; and a half second later I am fucking thrown around in my car. I gathered my composure, pulled over to the shoulder and got out of my car.

At this point the rain is still drizzling, I'm cussing, and the other driver (in a Ford pick-up truck is out of his car as well. We meet at the back end of my car, and I must say... I felt like SWV. My whole jawn caved the fuck in. So he asks me if I'm going to call or he is. He calls and a cop arrives maybe 5 minutes later. In this span of five minutes, he tries to make small talk. "Oh, you were on your way to classes, me too. -chuckle" or "I'm really sorry about this man, I hit the brakes too late. . ." . At this point, I'm pinching myself to make sure I'm not just dreaming all this bullshit in my overly exaggerated mind. This was not the case.

I get back into my car, call pops. Then the insurance company. As I am speaking with my handler, the cop (she) asks me for my license and my insurance card. I look out my sideview and see her ask him the same. She goes back to her car and disappears for 25 or so minutes. I'm still on the phone with my handler and have blazed through 5 or so newports at this time when the cop comes back.

I did not see her talk to him, and I know she didn't talk to me about what happened or my take on the situation present. But, she hands me my license, my insurance card, the accident report website??? card, and a gift. The gift was a citation for what she quaintly put as, "...failure to turn left at a stop sign." In my shock & awe, I forgot to ask her why I was being cited and not him. This is not good. No story of mine was taken into account from what I can tell, so it's looking likea huge fabrication. My court date is 12/10. And once again, I am dreading these wars I have to go through JUST to prove how I was in the right.

Long story short, niggas can't drive. I'm not talking about me either. With no cigarette lit during the time of the accident, no phone in my hand, not food in my lap... I was very conscious about what I was doing. How fast was he going ? Fast enough to put THAT amount of damage into the back of my car while I was pushing about 45 MPH. So, you decide for yourself but ask yourself these questions.

If I failed to yield at a stop sign, why is the damage only on the back end of my car and not on the passenger side at all ?
How could one be driving 45 MPH accelerating to 55 in a 55 MPH speed zone be at fault when the crush damage is THAT significant on my car. How fast was HE going ?
Why didn't the accident occur IN the intersection, and at a point where we could both turn onto the shoulder without difficulty ?

GUILTY UNTIL PROVEN INNOCENT ?

Doubtful. What sucks is now I can't even meet with my grandfather's nephew to politic about criminology today due to my car being caved in. And the thing is, I was OFF from my Law classes this week because the HUGE annual conference for Criminology is being held in STL all week/weekend. And HE is the highlight speaker! And he's related to me! Dude, fuck life.

No, I don't LOVE Lucy.

Barack O'Problems

2008-11-04T21:53:00.002-06:00

LONG DAY, I'll write this shit after I hibernate.

Really, I will.

EDIT: -sigh .

I am mad late on this, and it was pushed aside. Just no desire was present for me to write upon this topic. But, in the most basic form, Election Day (Nov. 4th) was bullshit to say the very least.

As I sit here trying to find this song... (long story), I recount the events of Nov. 4th. First let me say, I worked the day of the election for the Feds as a Judge over the election. Easy enough.

Fuck it, let me do this in bullets, it makes more sense. Plus, I'm not up for the narrative I usually compose. So, I hope these get my point across.

Judge over the Election, meaning I have more authority than you.
Paid a flat rate, tax-free, 390 dolares for 13? hours of work.
Black people are mad ignorant when they think "change" is coming.
White people are just as ignorant in that light.
I had to sit at a table with all Democrats praising Obama all day.
Did you know Obama is a Socialist ?
BTW, Communism = Socialism.
Change does not define anything being "good" or "better" change can be for the worse.
The black girl that sat next to me during the whole election didn't speak a word to me. Good thing, because not only was she unpleasant to look at, but also unpleasant to speak to.
My father was first line of command at our 5 precincts, while Tina was second... which makes me third. Which was lame, but I did boss people around.
There were TOO many black people that came in to vote without registering to vote. JOKE IS ON THOSE NIGGAS. ROFLROFLROFLCOPTER SUPREME.
I was the only person doing work at 3 of the 5 precincts, which was bullshit since I just got inundated as a Judge.
I got a bunch of people to vote, although there were errors with the system. So, next time you see me I expect a humongous "thank you" .
Chicago should annex itself from Illinois and be it's own state.
I graduated with Tina's daughter. By the way, Tina is a MILF.
Our precincts were the most crowded on the East side of STL, so the news crew "FOX 2" came out to interview who was in charge (that being my father). After his interview, they found out I was his son and proceeded to ask me for an interview. I told them I don't do interviews or autographs. The look on the reporter's face was fucking priceless.
I spoke with my ex's parents when they came up to vote... separately... her mom hit on me. Her father congratulated me on some shit, another long story. "I don't know why Erica chose to mess with dudeXYZ over you, the only guy I liked that she brought home was you." Uh... thanks ?
It was a long day, a very long day.
I learned I dislike Steak & Shake with an unwavering hatred after the lunch we had bought for us.
Being emotionally disturbed is now a handicap, and you can buy a dog for it to "cope with the pain". This is a fact, and it is also bullshit in the common sense respect.
Niggers that scream, "Fuck you crackers and McCain!" in my presence not only got thrown out forcefully, but got a phone call from the authorities after that when I reported them for disturbing the peace & solicitation. Hope those charges look good on your already tarnished record.
I may be stern, arrogant, and indignant; but I am right, always.
Always.

ANYWAYYYY, that is the gist of my Election Day. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a satunch ignorant Republican. I vote for whoever is benefitting ME more. I do not vote for what is going to "better my community", because I don't plan on living here for the rest of my life. But, 2 years down the line, I vote for what I believe as far as a person's platform and executive strategy will help me out. With that being said, I voted for who did the most by me. Did I agree with all that person's agenda? No. Did I agree with them more than Barack's? Yes.

But, that's just me. In the meantime, I'll be throwing funds by the note before I get raped with taxes come Jan. 20th.

HAPPY 4-YEAR TAX PROBLEM DAYYYY!

O31

2008-10-31T14:06:00.007-05:00

Left 4 Dead zombies pwn life.

I must say... when this game drops I am going to be hard-pressed for enough time to waste my life away on it. Not to mention the contest for the character make-up is ridiculously crack. PAUSE! Some were sub-par, and I mean very sub-par. But I couldn't do the shit they're doing. So kudos ? I guess. I do say, I think I liked the second person's jawn the best. Which is yours ? Anyway, onto bigger and better things.

This holiday is almost as bad as Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, and New Year's.

ALMOST.

Only redemption this holiday brings is the fact morons & retards alike make themselves look even more stupid as they dress up into costumes to plead for candy for suspecting elderly neighbors. Funniest part of this is these people do it at their OWN expenses. Even today I saw some douche bag while walking away from my class dressed up in the classic "Death" costume. All I could do was bust out laughing uncontrollably. Nikki looked at me and started laughing too, Spencer just shook his head and took a couple more puffs of his Black. I just could not stop laughing. Now, some people try to justify their dressing up because "everyone else is doing it". By far that is the worst reason. You are a grown ass human being and you're dressing up as a bumblebee (no shots), a pint of milk, a lawyer, an old school basketball player, or even something relative to your ethnic background's culture, et al. Hilarious.

The way I see it; I see these (you) people every day. Why would I want to go to a party, or go around begging old people for candy while we look like complete asses ? I do that fine by looking like my damn self on a DAILY Basis. Not to mention, watching my cohorts get drunk/party in their regular attire or in a vampire outfit is not even a fucking stretch of my imagination.

To each his own. With that being said... Halloween is pointless in my eyes. But, to keep up with what seems to be running tradition for me lately I am participating in the whole "dress up" gig. What am I dressing up as ? Well... Feast your eyes upon my costume.

It's obvious I dressed up like a nigga that doesn't give a fuck. You can tell by the ink stained pant leg, the GRUMPY t-shirt, the lack of a shave/haircut, and the flamboyant hoody (I threw this costume together in 30 seconds!!!!). What can I say ? It was a bit cold outside this morning, so I needed a hoody. See this shit... it isn't TOO far of a stretch. See how Halloween is bullshit ? Hahhhhhnnnnnnnnnn ?!?!?!?! Back to playing CRACKDOWN. I mean, there's nothing else to do until someone calls. WOW WTF, someone called right as I'm typing this. Eerie. Gotta bounce; I guess CRACKDOWN a tad bit later. "Happy Halloween", don't get tricked into the van for candy!

But yeah... enjoy the video, that shit was dope.

"There's always NEXT year."

Yawnmode

2008-10-29T11:23:00.005-05:00

I'm not saying this to shake you up
I'm just saying this to wake you up
It's all good when we're making love
All I ask is don't take our love
For granted, it's granted
My love for you is real
Baby, if you don't love me... somebody else will
So don't you, ever get too... comfortableeeeeeeeeee .
Lil' Wayne Feat. Babyface - Comfortable.mp3

After about 45 minutes of quiet contemplation...

...in Lucille... I decided to head back home after depositing this check. Woke up on time, got to class late. Sat in my car debating whether or not to attempt the journey to the building all my classes reside in. I ultimately weighed the pros and cons for about a hour and said fuck it. Today is just not one of those days. Spanish is remedial, Corrections has gotten boring with the rambling of facts, and LE we're watching The Departed. So bleh, I have better stuff to do like homework, extra credit, and sleep.

I figure I'll sprawl myself across my bed and pass out reluctantly as usual. I'm starting to have vivid dreams again, really disturbing dreams. Not nightmares, just disturbing dreams. Premonitions if you believe in that. Eh, I don't know.

I was reading through some OLDDDDDD logs of conversations yesterday after I spoke with 'Dre. Came across a woman to be unnamed and something she wrote about me. This being below. Enjoy (or if you're like me, don't enjoy) .

gone again.

[Friday, October 10th, 2008
@ 12:13am]

You’ll Miss me like Christmas -
..Claus’s wife.
And won’t wait like its the eve
in the evening light.
You’ll wish like it’s your last
and you’ve used them twice,
that I’d come back like seconds
when the mood is right.
Blink twice with your arms crossed.
Thoughts entice
how I’m the type to pay attention to.
The cost is right.
I’m not a barker.
Think my bite is much stronger
than the outer skin
of the trunks you find
birds nests inhabiting.
But you can’t have back
the realest shit you’d ever seen.
You’ll wish that I would never leave
like an evergreen.
But really
I am only onto much better things,
I won’t spell it out,
I’ll just design flyer lettering.
Your pace is just a back peddle
far too often.
A leg trap I give a crap
to get my laces locked in.
So take that, take that,
like its Puffy talking.
You can go on running shit,
I’ll leave this fucker leisure walking.

Oh how those words made my blood boil . ***

THESE Niggas

2008-10-28T22:01:00.006-05:00

The topic of conversation... after Justene Jaro .

AS WE BEGIN !

god with a pen (9:55:42 PM): i wouldn't doubt that was in STL son
god with a pen (9:55:45 PM): shameful
GreatOne9835 (9:56:01 PM): lmao
GreatOne9835 (9:56:07 PM): aight u ready fo this
god with a pen (9:56:15 PM): -straps seatbelt
GreatOne9835 (9:56:16 PM): dat girl can get it
god with a pen (9:56:17 PM): hit me son
GreatOne9835 (9:56:23 PM): da one u sent me
GreatOne9835 (9:56:26 PM): but dis one rite here
GreatOne9835 (9:56:29 PM): rite here...
GreatOne9835 (9:56:29 PM): <>
god with a pen (9:57:00 PM): lol @ BUTTERFACE BRO!
god with a pen (9:57:06 PM): debating on hitting that x
god with a pen (9:57:17 PM): uh oh wait up
GreatOne9835 (9:57:36 PM): excuse me?
GreatOne9835 (9:57:40 PM): keep watchin nigga
god with a pen (9:57:51 PM): i think
GreatOne9835 (9:57:51 PM): watch wut u say that gods girl
god with a pen (9:57:58 PM): LMFAO
god with a pen (9:58:01 PM): yo serious shit
god with a pen (9:58:05 PM): i think these chicks
god with a pen (9:58:12 PM): are just figments of our imaginations
god with a pen (9:58:18 PM): cause i never see chicks THAT bad
god with a pen (9:58:23 PM): in real life son
GreatOne9835 (9:58:29 PM): so u sayin she got it?
god with a pen (9:58:36 PM): mos def
GreatOne9835 (9:58:41 PM): o yeah
GreatOne9835 (9:58:49 PM): i will catch a charge
GreatOne9835 (9:58:51 PM): no bullshit
god with a pen (9:58:56 PM): LMFAOOOOO
GreatOne9835 (9:59:01 PM): think im playin
GreatOne9835 (9:59:10 PM): dis y i dont surround maself
GreatOne9835 (9:59:16 PM): all that
GreatOne9835 (9:59:21 PM): who wuldnt go crazy
GreatOne9835 (9:59:41 PM): nigga sed...god with a pen (10:57:18 PM): uh oh wait up
god with a pen (9:59:42 PM): -watches again
GreatOne9835 (9:59:43 PM): lmao
GreatOne9835 (9:59:43 PM): lmao
GreatOne9835 (9:59:44 PM): lmao
GreatOne9835 (9:59:45 PM): lmao
god with a pen (9:59:46 PM): LLMFAO
GreatOne9835 (9:59:46 PM): lmao
GreatOne9835 (9:59:47 PM): lmao
GreatOne9835 (9:59:48 PM): lmao

ROFL @ 'Dre son. I'm so far gone.

Is ________, A Date ?

2008-10-27T21:54:00.006-05:00

If she thinks that was the most fucked up ,
thing I could say to hurt
Then how am I going to break
that I cheated on her ?

Slight Conversational Monologue

Liyah, Liyah, Liyah. So glad I have you, but your phone maynnnnnn. You're the only woman I know that won't mix my words up. Chill, chill, chill. Keeping her on my side of the ring for ages. It must KILL one's self to brood over bullshit like this. Especially when that person knows they're lying to my face. Welcome to the real world niggas!

Almost made a mistake today, but it seems shit panned itself out . Chick called me and told me she was hitting this Halloween party up. Gonna be a bumble bee or something of the sort. Asked me what I was doing for O31... shit, nothing. She's going to some club... 10-14 STL or something. I don't have time for costume parties and shit nowadays. Clubs aren't me anymore. But, she went on to venture some actions... So I pose you a question. Read the title, fill in the blank with what you may be thinking. And ASK YOURSELF . Have an answer ?

Well, we'll see Friday night.

Yeah, I have it and you don't.

Shit is mad dope too, props to 'Liyah for the chin up on everything. First song on the playlist is actually off the new Joey B jawn. Nigga jocked my phrase as well, just listen to the track after you're done with the visuals at the top of this post. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Back to business !

Throw a shot, niggas are getting some back. I can't help it, I have arrogance and pride to keep intact. You're the first chick to bitch about people being in OUR business, but monologue shit on the degree of description you do. -looks around. Somebody give her a hand clap. And you think THAT's the worst I could say to hurt ? You underestimate me still. I thought after I caught you lying to me, you'd learn. But I guess you birds of a feather flock to warmer weather when shit goes SOUTH. Really, I mean... just keep your slick shit to yourself. You know it only gets worse at this point. I'm not the one blabbing to everyone and their mother. Pick your attitude out of the middle school pool you dipped it in .

Pause !
Sike naw, she must be blind like Stevie Wonder
Matter of fact; I could never flock in with the birds

"I try and keep it 100 ! NON - FICTION !"

The End

2008-10-26T12:59:00.005-05:00

I have always loved that picture. Depicting the end of the line, so to speak. Phenomenal photography, at least in my opinion. Parallels as well, with a variety of things. Word to the wise, if you keep it consistent with me I will be around all the time. If you tend to scatter, flip-flop, have a period more than once a month (or once a month if you're one of my male friends), or have sketchy tendencies... expect to be escorted out of the stadium as your seat on the bench is taken.

The whole problem with the most recent of events later this morning, was nothing added up with what she was saying. There was no phone call I received, no voicemail, and no explanation but 24+ days after. No dots she connected made sense, so they all stenched of lies. At this point, it's only a process in which I've become too accustomed to in the past several years. And I guess it's time to practice my steps on this one as well. If you would like to learn a thing or two (at least vaguely) about how to erase someone from your memory and/or life; feel free to head over to the Lyrical Prowess blog where I will be starting a new 12 Step project. The first step being "Powerless", because you have to admit your helplessness against your addiction... agreed ? Alright ? Good.

And again, sorry it had to turn out this way. But the stories didn't correlate.

HiZZY !: Well wishes! Hope everything pans out for you.
HiZZY !: Adieu.

I suppose it's time for work. I'll be back around midnight.

I guess she lost one, one, one .

I Fell In Lo<3333333

2008-10-25T00:36:00.005-05:00

With Justene Jaro ???

No... it wasn't with my future Mrs. up there. HARHARHAR. Though Mrs. Peterson up there has me salivating every time I look at her (damn my primal male instincts), she is not the one I'm speaking on. Actually, she had pig tails, chinky eyes, and was 3 1/2 years old. Cutest girl EVERRRR. I swear I wanted to buy her from her mom; but her mother said, "Noooo!" with a giggle. The girl wanted some Wii game we were out of, I felt so bad. Her eyes got all sparkly with a slight frown and shit... I was like apologizing and shit for the lack of gay Wii game for her. Doesn't matter!!! I'm trying to figure out how the hell a soon-to-be 4 year old had me on some "awwwwwwwww" shit. I don't get all out of my composure over ANYONE, but for this girl man. Haha. Though, I may kidnap her the next time they come through the job. Even if her name was ugly, I'll change it after I stash her away. (^_^)v

I fell in love... with the most beautiful woman that has been in my presence since April.

Oh man, someone pinch me.***

In and right back out mayn, just a quick update!
(The picture is just eye-candy, yenno?! Hah !!!)

Experimentation

2008-10-24T12:49:00.003-05:00

And I'm not talking drug usage.
Though I do have a blunt rolled in front of me as I scribe this...

Despite this surprising fact, I cannot smoke it. Not only because I have work in ~4 hours, I when I smoke I go all out. But because I have no will to smoke it. Maybe I really have gotten over THAT part of my life and need to move beyond it. Ehhhh, it's up in the air. Oh to remember the timesssssss.

Salutations. Reworked the right side of the page a little, added some stuff. A new portrait jawn. Chat? box... not really sure what it is. (THUS THE TITLE OF THE BLOG LOLZOZOLOLOL). And the followers jawn. Eh, win some and lose some. I figure I'll keep the follower jawn up as an experiment to see how many people are actually brave enough to click the icon. Hah, inside joke. But, yeah. That's the gist of it.

Well... it made ME laugh. Hopefully shit pans out, life is so much more consistent when it's planned out. You knowwww, lately women been wanting some hand outs. I'm bored to no end, waiting for 5:30 to froll around. LOL @ the e-mail I got on the 22nd of this month. I about died of laughter. Gotta be kidding me. Keep it to yourself, and hopefully in time you'll get over it.

"I guess that nigga's style was more of a slam dunk, and my shit was more of a finger roll."

Reworking of the playlist is complete. Keep it more simple than not. Was convoluted for a minute there, had to refereshen it. Yeezy, Joey B., YB, Mos... etc. That about covers it. Ehhh don't got shit else to say. Hit me up to the right of the blog, I'm tryna test shit out B! I mean, seriously.

Holler hollerrrrrrr.
EDIT***********: PINGBOX IS THAT CRACCCCCK, LOL.

Let me light this up .

Better Late Than Never ???

2008-10-22T23:09:00.004-05:00

NOPE!!! NONE OF THAT MY WAY.

ROFLLLLLLLLLLLL, TAKE THE CUE & THE SEAT.

Preferred when I wake up tomorrow morning. But only six of you matter anyway.

Silly hoes, it's about time you get over it.

Get Over It

2008-10-20T03:20:00.005-05:00

I'm gonna start this off how I wouldn't usually...
you know, I am my favorite rapper.
I even make Drake's shit smoother... no disrespect.

Uh huh, nigga I stand out
Walking through my stomping grounds like I demand clout
Cutting to paste, it seems all my endeavors remember my face
Only because those women tend to be wanting a hand out
But... when fingers rub I start to fit in the crowd
And when the drink prices go up, I tend to stay in the house
Because no bitch is worth five dollar jack & coke shots in cold weather
When in winter I don't get bitter, only betterrrrrrr

Holy shit, I really should take my ass to bed.

The beginning of the verse is better than Drake's though. Say different.

HAH! Niggas, get over it.

http://similartohaze.blogspot.com/ ******

Easy To Forget ?

2008-10-19T01:39:00.007-05:00

At least when I'm asleep. Dude, let me just list some shit that's been on my mind heavy for the past few days. I mean, not even on some human relations type of shit. Just material. I'm not usually the type of dude to foam at the mouth over some material object, but... here goes.

Getting this jawn as an early Christmas present for myself...

120 GB
265 $
Sexy

Yeah... this is for my indulgence.

I mean... I was thinking about buying her one and not going against my promise that I was going to get her something for Christmas. But, I've had an extreme change of heart, and I'm not trying to look like a bird. So here's well wishes to you, and hopes whoever you're fucking gets you something.

-raises glass !

But son, look at the backgrounds...

Too dope... too fucking dope...

Otherwise, I dropped like 14 dollars on these sick Chucks. Friday wasn't much to it. Clarified I have the job... my bad for gassing that up. So tired, so tired. Drowsy is more the word. I'm slowly but surely getting rid of my co-dependency on smoking. Which I guess is good, makes me feel a bit empty though. I don't know how that makes any sense, but it is how one feels after going cold turkey on something as habitual as smoking has been for me the past 7 or so years.

To round this up!

I have church tomorrow then directly after is work. All I can say is... I'm glad shorty is cycling me out of her "My Faves". And I'm glad shit didn't work out with me & her. Knew her ass would get weeded out one day or another. Thanks Liz for the talk earlier, it helped a little. And yo, Carmine. LOL @ your dream. Never happening son.

keepitconsistent

SAKE MAN!!!!!

2008-10-17T15:21:00.006-05:00

Damn... have the last two days been eventful... really made up for 15 days ago.

Let me re-cap, for the 6 people or so that still have this blog opened to them. Feel privileged!

As most know, I cut people off with a quickness. No remorse, especially with women whom lie to my face and have the ignorance to think I won't find out. But that's in the past! PASTPASTPAST, well wishes to those few I actually cared enough to think wouldn't do improper shit. Yes Elisa, that is for you. Yes Mai, that is for you. Yes Lola (Brittney, w/e the fuck your name is), that is for you.

But anyway, I digress. With these recent severing of rope, I come off clean, fresh, and newly even more arrogant due to the fact of my thoughts and feelings being justified. But this post isn't about that. It is about the prior two days in my realm. First off, Thursday...

SAKEEEEE-MANNNNN!!!!

I woke up very strangely... from a vividly detailed dream entailing two years into the future. The cast of characters being the same. My closest of friends: Mike, Ivan, Ste'phon, & this guy named Toshi; a few unfamiliar faces of women I supposedly knew to some extent, my most recent ex love affair, and myself. Long story short, I was tying the few loose ends I had in St. Louis before I headed off. Myself and Ivan riding in the passenger stopped at a bus-stop due to HIS car breaking down. My hair freshly cut, in the best physical shape of my life, arrogant persona intact... I looked down. There was LOLWUTSHERFACE sitting at the bus stop with her newly acquired plaything. She muttered the words, "I'm glad I'm not attracted to American men any longer", with a smirk. Kissed dude, and looked up at me to see if there were any reaction on my experesionless face. I laughed, cranked my ZUNE louder and went about my business until Ivan got a call and pulled me aside. Simple, it was his sister calling for me. I pass him my mp3 jawn and talk to Maria for a short stint, wondering how many more days it would be until I was in Los Angeles. I gave her a made-up count in order to buy more time with my work in STL and got off the phone with her as the bus came. Come to find out, the two aforementioned at the stop along with us hopped on the bus as well with intentions to sit right next to us. As we rode closer and closer toward the river she said she loved him, and I woke up.

But, that again was just serenely strange. The first thing I did as I awoke was mow the fucking lawn on complete impulse. At 55 degrees, and nothing but shorts and a practice basketball jersey from high school... I clipped it up and made it look nice. Score another healthy pocket.

With nothing else to do, I decided to call Liyah. She's my new resort to phone conversation. I swear I love her, at least that's what it feels like. But not that regular "oh bew ily sooo much" kind of love, but the "understanding on EVERY level" kind of love. And no Liz, that's not referring to you and Carmine either. Thank GOD for her for the past two weeks especially. She helps me cope and reminds me the women that have shed blatant lies from their mouths are not to be forgiven. She keeps my mind sound.

The call interrupted by her class starting, I shaved myself up & took a shower. I swear AXE body wash: Touch is that business. Smells right as hell man. Came out, got dressed, sat down and renamed/downloaded some more music to fuck with. A couple new instrumentals for the mixtape (ROADS). SIDENOTE: ROADS won't be coming out in Nov. Looking at Feb. 2009.***** Anyway, sat down with a nice set of classical music on my playlist and talked to Jayson. A long time friend, haven't heard from him in about a year. Coolest white kid on earth, major weed head. More on him a tad later on... maybe on the update of this blog.

As Liyah got out of class, she hit me up only to be interrupted again by my side of the line. Thursday nights always equal nights when I go out. Destination? The new Hibachi bar.

Father and mother in tow, I figured I'd shell out for the dinner this time. It's only fair. Bad decision as I looke dat the bill afterward LAWL, but it was well enough. We entered and I spotted all the Asian women. I think I about fell over I was smiling so fucking hard. Thank god for Japanese women. Had to sit next to this extremely rude redneck couple and their 4 year old. My father and I jan-ken-po'd for the seat away from the kid. I graciously won. LAWLLALWLALWLALWL. Anyway, our hibachi chef was mad cool. Around my age, we talked about all types of shit. Music, his ethnic background, the whole nine. Mad cool dude... until the tricks flared.

Hibachi restaurants are known for the flashiness fo the cooking right in front of you. Tossing of food into mouths, etc. Well, let's just say he started pouring sake onto the grill and asked me if I wanted some. I was like nawwww, can't do that. He turned to pops and I made him do it since I fell to the humiliation of cathing some egg in my mouth (no brokeback) a few minutes earlier. Turns out my pops can take alot of liqour to the face. He got the equivalent to about 5 - 6 shots of vodka in a 30 second span. Thus his new nickname...

SAKE MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!

I will never fucking forget that. But, after he was done cooking we said our farewells and the owner asked us a few questions. It's in times like these my mother and I alternate through Italian and Spanish to talk to each other so people can't understand what the fuck we're saying about them. Think... the chinks in the nail salon. But we told him everything was great, cheaper, etc. And we left the restaurant. The waitress was a chick I was fucking in HS, and I'm glad she had the decency to not bring ANYTHING up about us. She wrote her number on the back of the receipt but I threw it in the trash on the way out. Otherwise a fantastic night. I laughed until I fucking cried.

Got home and I have a missed call and voicemail. I thought it was Liyah all Noah-sick. Knawmean?!?! Wrong. It was Nicole telling me I'm hired at Toys 'R' Us. SCORE. Employment, great food, laughter, and complacency. Finally!

I'll update tomorrow on some shit... but I did get the job finalized. I met our hibachi chef at classes today walking around, turns out he goes to my college. Seems I didn't ask if he went to college or not, hah! Oh... and his name is Toshi. Mark up one for the eerieness of my dreams. Not to mention I'm a judge as well. I bet you didn't know that. Go ahead, brag that you know a judge to your friends.

Otherwise, I'll let you go. I know this was a LONG textual post.

ARTIST RENDITION OF THE INFAMOUS SAKE MAN!!!
Hah.

Good times, good fucking times...

Adieu, adieu... I shot down two.

2008-10-09T04:29:00.004-05:00

I was going to go off at the mouth... but I think I've learned better.

I think this is what the older folks call "growth".

Adieu, adieu.
I shot down two.

"All I wanted to do tonight was watch a bootlegged Dexter DVD... but then THIS shit happened."

I shot two down.

Sleight

2008-10-07T20:19:00.003-05:00

Seems Blogger does not agree with the order in which I posted some shit...

So therefore, I have to re-work everything from outside of GC and only post on Firefox. What a disappointment.

(looks at the last post...)

Yeah, that's the face I'm making right now as well.

Boo, nigga, boo...

2008-10-04T15:46:00.002-05:00

Want to know what I think about people with two-faces ?

That shit sums it up.

LEGENDARY?!

2008-09-27T20:43:00.008-05:00

LOL, St. Louis Zoo. I had too much fucking fun. You see, I had TWO videos of my and some people cracking racist/silly/sarcastic jokes all over the zoo, but they didn't save. I'm sorry, I fail.
Or do I? You decide! Unless you're a black woman, then your opinion really doesn't matter. ^_^v

Is it getting more epic?! I think it issss.

The zoo seems to be informative! Not only did I find out Carmine was a bird, but I discovered his nickname for Lizzy is "Bee"! Which makes sense, because she is yellow... and wears black shirts a lot. ZINNNGGGGGGGGGGG!!!

Y HAY THUR MR. TIGER. DO U NO TIGGER? LOLZOLOLOLOL.

Why no, that isn't a bird. That sign displaying the description is very observant.
And as a grand finaleeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Yes, a grand finale!

And now this post is abolished of all fail.

Hawlur if ya hear me.

An Ode To Blonde Actresses

2008-09-23T21:53:00.007-05:00

Oh blonde actress!

How can you have me looking so longingly?
I remember when you used to be on Veronica Mars (what a gay show...)
I'm glad you're now on Heroes!
Well... since last season, but you're back!
I am pretty sure not only would I rape you in the most loving way
But I would also allow you to do some things along the lines of oral sex
No disrespect!, I wouldn't want the Elle Bishop in you to come out
I don't believe 500 volts of electricity would feel too pleasant
But you do see how you're laying down in that picture above?

That is how you will look right before I please you 500 times every night.

Fin~

What's A Firefox?

2008-09-22T04:59:00.002-05:00

When you have GC to give you webpages like this to send you in to hysterical laughter at 5:00 AM on a Monday morning?!

Sidenote: New playlist on both sections of my blog, and new entries into the LP.

I love my new interwebz browser.

Brown Hair, Blue Eyes, Nerdy Mind

2008-09-19T18:56:00.004-05:00

I'M IN LOVE.

EDIT******* : I expose fakes.

HAZE : you're just proving my point to a further extent
capti.vating : What's your point?
HAZE : all women lie
HAZE : i mean
HAZE : this is kind of the tip of the iceberg
capti.vating : Men lie too
HAZE : but i've been letting you lie since like mid july
HAZE : even asked you if you had shit to come clean about
HAZE : but nope, yeen say shit about it
capti.vating : lmao what have I been lying about?
HAZE : lmao i saw your myspace before you took those pictures down
HAZE : and unfortunately, the pics you sent me did not match up with the pics on your myspace
HAZE : so i know you've been lying for quite a while.
HAZE : quite disappointing.
HAZE : gave you a chance to come clean
HAZE : and you continued on with the lie for another 2 months+
HAZE : obviously that went over your head and you underestimated me off jump.
capti.vating : Oh .. Well im sorry .. Ill let you be now
HAZE : like i'm an idiot or something.
capti.vating : Well your not
HAZE : no shit i'm not
capti.vating : I never thought you were
capti.vating : I felt you knew ..
capti.vating : But I didn't say anything
HAZE : you thought i was dumb enough to believe those were actually your pics.
capti.vating : Lol yea .. Imma go now
HAZE : have a nice rest of your life trying to fool niggas.
capti.vating : im not .. I ve hurt one person before .. And ruined a good friendship with you .. So im giving up the online lies ..
HAZE : lol, i hope so b
HAZE : but, blockmode!

From 1:26:00 PM to 1:35:17 PM (9/20/2008). Time stamps to prove it!

Oh, you're gonna lie to me?

Watch Me As I Settle In !

2008-09-19T11:56:00.002-05:00

I'm a hard guy to get along with, get on a song with
When shit be going right, well I just flip it to the wrong shit
The team that I belong to, the artists I put on with
Don't ever ask for nothing 'cause them niggas got they own shittttt
Me and the circle like a mouth full of hot peppers
Red Neon with black seats, I call it playing checkers
I'm never doing verses, I'm forever giving lectures
If you're trying to meet with money, I'll be happy to connect yaaaaa
Life feels better than it's ever been, scheduling
Million dollar meetings with the presidentttt
Someone cut the lights on!, where is Thomas Edison?
Got a new condo, watch me as I settle in !!!
I deserve a MTV show for me and my people
And if you tryna zone, I have a WHOLE swisher sweet full
Rappers all liars, all women are deceitful
Add it until they subtract me, I'll NEVER be their equal...

Fuck you pussy ass hater you should do you

Yeen ever heard of me.

One Century

2008-09-16T02:05:00.003-05:00

Debating whether to do this or not... fuck it. I don't care anyway. I figure I'm bored enough to facet this blog at 2:06 AM, I may as well socket it with something new.

I have logged 200 posts to this date, I truthfully think my LP blog is better.
I'm 20 years old... I feel like I'm 30+.
I'm Algerian, Italian and Cherokee.
I'm a military brat, I've lived EVERYWHERE. (No, I don't care if you are too.)
I was going to be a father once upon a time.
My family despises me, this is evident through various reasons/actions on their part.
I have a half sister whom is never to be discussed in this household.
I have my Associates in Arts degree.
I tend to begin relationships with the worst women on the planet. This is never evident before the relationship starts. But that's a whole other novel to portray.
I can sing.
I was enrolled in ballet when I was six, but got pulled out of the program. I now dance hip-hop, but haven't even stepped foot inside a dance studio in 5+ years.
I'm a lazy perfectionist.
Procrastination is my vice... I see it as a godly trait. I thrive off the pressure to get something done at the last minute.
My IQ is higher than yours, guaranteed.
I played basketball and football during my earlier high school years. Due to some differences I had with my coaches, I told them to fuck off. I then quit.
I make friends easily, but I am extremely timid in new situations.
I used to sell drugs; namely marijuana and pure cocaine.
I've been stabbed in my shoulder.
I can bench press 330+ lbs.
I'm around 5'10" in height. Haven't measured myself in ages though.
I want to travel.
I don't know my biological grandfather on my mother's side. He's a racist dick.
I am predominately attracted to Filipino women, I have no idea why.
I was introduced to hip-hop when I was six years old. My first CD was illmatic.
I have a scar on my left forearm, it is a reminder of what depression means.
I do not believe in astrological signs, fortunes in fortune cookies, Ms. Cleo, unicorns, palm readers, or midgets. I believe they're all figments of our imagination. But, I do believe in the Chupacabra.
I am voting for McCain. (No, I don't care about your political beliefs.)
My first crush was in third grade. Her name was Amanda Tauzin.
I am a skilled tinikler.
I have an extensive vernacular, but my favorite words are derogatory and socially unacceptable in normal conversation. (i.e. fuck, bitch, faggot).
I dislike black women; there are an endless amount of reasons. None of them being stereotypes... even though most of them are in fact ignorant hormonal bitches with egos bigger than their brains. Too bad that's not saying much.
I buy shoes too often. Most of my shoes are SB Dunks, Jordans, or New Balance. I was into New Balance before it was cool.
I believe Goten was the best Dragonball Z character. Fuck that, I know he was.
I have a retardedly high amount of hand-eye coordination.
I am colorblind.
I don't enjoy drinking alcohol; and if I do drink I tend to do so in moderation.
I am a chronic smoker, I started smoking when I was 13. Weed to Black & Milds to cigarettes. The latter began last year.
My brother has ADD, and it has ultimately been MY curse for the past 20 years.
I'm a sarcastic pessimist. I tend to voice my opinion whether you want to hear it, or if it will hurt your feelings or not.
Stereotypes make me laugh and I use them in abundance. I believe this is why people think I'm racist. I'm not.
I drive a 2001 Dodge Neon. People say it's a purpleish magenta. I don't really give a fuck because I'm colorblind. It gets me from point A to point B. Her name is Lucille.
I have a Verizon Wireless phone. It's a Motorola piece of shit. Since my LG broke on me last year this is all I have to work with.
I am an extremely heavy sleeper. I slept through an earthquake recently.
Hawai'i was by far the best place I've lived in my lifetime thus far.
I'm ambidextrous.
There are over 13,000 songs on my computer; I only listen to about 2,500 on a regular basis.
I have two dogs. Sadie is dumb, but cute. Leilani is smart, but (some say she is) ugly. I adore both of them. Sadie is 2, Leilani is 5.
I used to play World of Warcraft. If you want some tips, or want to buy an account for two EPIC 70 characters... HAWLUR AT A PLAYUHHHH.
I'm lactose intolerant.
My favorite book is Finding Fish: A Memoir.
If I were a superhero, my "Kryptonite" would be styrofoam. I HATE the sound of styrofoam rubbing together.
Daybreak was my favorite TV show of all time. I have since boycotted ABC since they cancelled it. I wish they would release a season DVD or continue the storyline with the same cast on another network.
I sleep on the right side of the bed. My future wife will hate me if she is accustomed to that side, because that bitch will be getting used to the other side.
I partied ALOT in high school, I do not enjoy it anymore. I find it to be childish to an enormous degree.
I box.
I dislike running. Not like running to get away from something, but recreational running. It is tedious. I never understood Track & Field.
I have seen someone die.
I once had two pet salamanders.
Sometimes I think I'm crazy, but in truth I'm just weird.
I am considered an athletic, timid, musically inclined, skateboarding, nerd scribe... at least by society's standards.
I dislike gossip to some degree; it seems EVERYONE finds me as the gossip outlet though.
My ex girlfriends are failures, this is non-fiction.
My major is Criminal Justice. I just want to shoot someone legally.
My favorite drink is a tie between SoBe POWER, and Strawberry Kiwi Kool-Aid. I do not believe neither can win that fight.
I gravitate toward a person's personality before their look. If they emenate stupidity, I make sure I never talk to them.
I'm pretty sure I was Ghengis Khan in my past life, and a snail before that.
The Ganges river has corpses floating down it. And people drink out of it. Cool fact for you.
If I were one of the 12 disciples, I would've been the one to smack Peter for saying stupid shit all the time.
I have an odd amount of Filipino friends. It's kind of disturbing once I think about it.
I don't believe I'll be relationship material for some time.
I brush my teeth in the shower.
My favorite dessert is cherry pie. I always buy one and cook it for my birthday. Mrs. Smith only. I remember my grandmother on my father's side made one from scratch and I puked up a cherry stem. Mrs. Smith makes the best, sorry grandma.
My middle name is my father's first name. My initials spell out "NAP".
My favorite movie is A Walk To Remember.
I am a King's Quest fiend. If you don't know what King's Quest is, google toolbar is your friend.
St. Louis is the STD capital of the United States of America as of 2008. Cool fact for you #2.
I believe batteries should last longer than they do. They run out at the worst times, always.
I cut my own hair. I COULD be a barber. Naaaaaahhhhh.
Break You Off by The ROOTs is the best song ever made. The album version of the song only.
I have a playboy bunny clock hanging on my wall. Handcrafted by me.
I am far-sighted and supposed to wear glasses. I have 20/15 vision though. I never wear my D&G glasses, ever.
I need a job, life seems so boring with nothing occupying one's time.
My favorite color is black. Which is a conundrum because black is void of all color.
I wish I could fast forward my life 2 or so years into the future. That would set me at the place I want to be right now.
I grow my hair out ever year, and I don't know why. I'm beginning to think I do it just to have something to aspire to.
I haven't cried in 7 years or so.
Despite what you've heard, seen, or lurk-read... I am the coolest person you will ever encounter in your lifetime. Which could be a good or a bad thing for you, depending on how much I hate you.
If I sing and you're on the phone with me, that means I am comfortable talking to you/being around you. Few have that privledge.
Monsoons are torrential winds despite common belief, not vast amounts of rain. Cool fact for you #3.
Saysaysaysaysaysaysay! Why's it gotta be a bitch?
Only one person on this planet will read this in it's entirety.
By the way, I am the dopest writer you will ever have the opprotunity to talk to. So I suggest getting in your questions, comments, etc. before I start charging for tips.

I keep it non-fiction.

One love.

When Dreams Fail

2008-09-11T05:08:00.002-05:00

...to keep me asleep, I either write or do something like this.

Tonight was a case of both instances, go check the LP blog.

Yes.

I live next to Circuit City, so I know about computers.

2008-09-07T09:26:00.007-05:00

Well, today has been a boring day. I woke up and went to church, promptly fell into a nice slumber as the pastor begin his sermon and woke up as he called for the last prayer and shit. Nice sleep. That azn girl and I are going to watch Babylon A.D. today sometime. We were going to watch it last night, but I was sleepy as shit and opted to watch it today. It's better be good

You know being a guy can have it's advantages and disadvantages.

ADVANTAGES

I have a penis.
I have a BIG penis
I don't bleed from my vagina every month.
I don't have boobs, even though those are nice to look at.
Oh yeah, I don't bleed from my vagina every fucking month.

DISADVANTAGES

Nothing... I'm a fucking guy.

Man, now that's how you should hold a watermelon. Two hands, fingers spread slightly, and lift with the shoulders. Speaking of... I love watermelon. Not seedless though. Seedless watermelons are for pussies and Asians (no offense, Mai ilyykt!). I'll take a bite of watermelon and then go spit the seeds at nuns as they walk by to go to their shitty Nunery. Lollerskatesz.

Oh yeah, Mai showed me her boobs...

God, she is so amazingly azn, isn't she? I mean, how can you hate her? Her mom is cool too. She made me this pho soup shit. Oh my god, it was fucking disgusting... but I sat there and ate it just to see Mai smile. And oh my when she laughs, it sounds like a dead giraffe being raped by a gorilla. It's oh so sexy.

She loves me long time.

Well, I'm going outside. If you know me well enough, you KNOW what I'm doing.

One.

Realistic?

2008-09-06T21:23:00.000-05:00

November 11, 2008.

I'll be there.

THE JONES EXPERIENCE

2008-09-04T10:49:00.005-05:00

Though I went to class yesterday, fuck it. Though it was a downpour yesterday, fuck it. Though none of my boys showed up, fuck it. Yesterday was all about me, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

If you DIDN'T know... yesterday (Sept. 3, 2008) marked THE JONES EXPERIENCE coming to St. Louis. And to be honest, it's refreshing. I haven't seen Nas in concert in over a year, and nothing remotely close to what these people do for music has graced our city since he was here last year. Came through looking fresh from my scalp to my ankles, and couldn't help but to piss and find my seat next to the stage with my bottle of water in hand.

I got there about a hour or so early, and was just lampin' to the various songs they played pre-show. Janet Jackson, A Tribe Called Quest?, Jay-Z, Billie Holiday, Pharcyde, The ROOTS, Common, Dwele, J. Dilla, and the like. The vibe was REAL smooth. My boys were SUPPOSED to come through and relax on this joyous ocassion, but of course they were no-shows once again. I can't complain, they always ruin shit anyway. And truthfully, I think I'm better in the environment I was in with the conversation I had with the people around me.

The concert enlisted 4 main people; Jay Electronica, Talib Kweli, DJ Green Lantern, & Nas. If you're not up on any one of those 4 people, search & download ASAP. It was mad late last night so I decided to upload what comes to follow this morning. With a shitty camera, my adrenaline pumping, and lack of video editing software I recorded these. There are 7 clips in total, but I'll post three from the main segments of the concert.

So, with no further ado... THE JONES EXPERIENCE.

Jay Electronica

Yes!

Talib Kweli

You're my HOT thingggggg.

Nas

Got a bitch called life, I pimped her... whaaaaaaaat?!

You can always click the youtube link to the right to see all the clips I have. But in all... classic soulful hip-hop. If you get a chance, peep any of them in concert. Thank GOD for their presence in St. Louis. I can't wait for Common or The ROOTS to touch ground here again so I can peep their LIVE shows next. Keep the peace people, trust.

One.

Easy

2008-09-02T13:53:00.002-05:00

So, there is one dance studio in STL that even remotely fucks with Hip-Hop. That's disappointing. I still have yet to find a job, GG @ persistence is key. Classes are redundant, especially SPAN 102. And finally, I'm on my last financial limb. At least I'm 1/4 of the way to securing my wallet back to it's max potential. At least...

I'm going to leave you with this though, and I hope you enjoy it.

'Twan AKA THe MaCHiNe

Duke is ridiculous.

Best tutter I've seen on the planet. 0:57 - 1:03 is straight psychotic. Anyway, I'll make some easy predictions for next season's ABDC right now. If Team Millenia doesn't try out again, Marvelous Motion will win hands down. Believe you me, MM will take it. And if they don't, ABDC is mos def rigged.

Marvelous Motion

LOL, I mean really though.

If only I lived in Houston. You think SoReal was on some shit? THESE niggas are double that, just watch the Falsetto choreography. And if you didn't know, these are the people from the studio SRC left. Lol... if they don't win son. Let ME find a dance studio in this hell hole called STL and it's game over.

TRUTHFULLY.

Dilemma

2008-08-29T16:56:00.003-05:00

Shit just takes a turn for the worst, always.

Late-night gaming has to stop.
Overslept a class today (SPAN 102), way to go Noah.
My wallet has been MIA for at least a week.
Still no job openings or call backs from any of my 150+ applications.
So bored lately, poor as fuck excluding the Savings account.

The highlight of these travesties is the fact my wallet is missing. I don't know WHERE it could be. I've thoroughly searched my room, clothes I might've left it in, my car, and the rest of the house I walk around. It's really distressing. Everything is replaceable in the wallet... except for the pictures. And one of those pictures I hold very very close. It's just infuriating and frustrating to know you can't find something you may never get back. I've never lost a wallet in the ten years I've had one, never lost an ID card, a Driver's license, or my debit card. So I'm sitting here looking fucking black-faced wondering where my precious wallet is. This an anomaly, and I'm about to blame it on someone stealing it or playing a sick joke. Because this has NEVER happened before, it's the only logical explanation.

I guess the only thing left to do is go to the DMV, AFB, university, and bank and get replacement cards for each and cough up the cash for each. And furthermore hope my wallet magically appears on my nightstand within the next few days...

EDIT: Lol, 5 dollars for a new school ID, 15 for a new license, and at least 10 for a new wallet. Doesn't sound like alot, but it's alot more than I'd have to pay for. Fuckkkkk life.

-sigh

Back for the Seventh Time

2008-08-25T15:12:00.012-05:00

I feel like a little mixed boy in a BIG campus world.

-I'll be back to fill you in on this part...

Yeah, yeah, I'm back! Here's the run-down on the 7th cycle.

Class 1 - SPAN 102

Teacher is built like a 2x4; really ugly and has braces.
There's one bomb girl in the class.
I got there 2 minutes late, and was informed that there is a 100 minute lab work requirement per week for this class.
If you didn't know, that's gay.
Oh, and the class is at 10 AM MWF. I have to wake up at 8 AM each of those days to make it to the campus on time.

Class 2 - CJ 202

Got the Head of the Dept. (CJ) as my instructor.
Dude has a sick sense of humor, and he's a master in Filipino martial arts.
He also let us out of the class 45 minutes early.
The class is from 12 PM - 1:15 PM.
This class will be superb.

SIDENOTE: I walked into the classroom at 11 AM thinking my class was right after SPAN 102. Negative. It was another SPAN class... 202 to be exact. So I was confused for a second there, until I looked at my schedule and saw I was a hour early. Fucking embarassing... but at least the teacher was a smokin' hawt latina. I wish she was MY teacher, gg.

Class 3 - CJ 208

My instructor is ex-Air Force, and an ex-Criminal Invesigator.
There are only three exams the whole semester, no homework.
He has a hilarious sense of humor as well, and a pretty cool beard.
The class is ~1 hour long (1:30 PM - 2:45 PM).
He ALSO let us out about 45 minutes early.
This class will also be superb.

Class 4 - SOC 111

I hate Sociology.
My teacher is a upside-down pear shaped black lady. She talks like a dumb white girl (you know, the ones with the upward inflection at the end of every sentence regardless if they're asking a question or not). Her fiance is a Colombian drug pushing refugee, and she claims she got "fat" over the summer. I call bullshit.
This class hinges on the fact that you must orally participate (no brokeback) in class.
This class will be the bane of my existence.
It is also 3 hours long (6 PM - 9 PM).

And that's the gist of my day. I came home between my 3rd and 4th classes because I had a FOURRRRRRR hour break (which usually wouldn't happen because gas prices are a mu'fucka in STL). But, instead of checking out the gym like I said I would; I decided to come home and stuff my face because I was dying of hunger. Oh, and to also dispel some rumors as seen below. Otherwise, the semester is looking to be pretty straight-forward. Hopefully it will FLY by. Hopefully. ANYWAY, down to my break!

Did you realize that you were a champion in their eyes?

Yes I did!

Fucking didn't notice my hands were too fast for the camera (I mos def need a new camera, this Canon is shit), or I wouldn'tve done the old choreography we did in FL. Oops? Yeah, I used to dance on some regular basis shit, hah. Had to clear your speculation and the sarcastic remarks I've been getting. Maybe a video later on in the future? LMFAO MAYBE.

P.S. ABDC auditions are supposed to hit STL October 19-21? (may have to look back at that info, not completely sure). But, if I had a crew I'd swing by. Too bad I don't, perhaps next year?

P.P.S. My floor glides > you.

Get with it.

Is This the Future?

2008-08-23T23:52:00.003-05:00

Well... at least a peek into the future for me.

Except I'll win every time.

Long Live SRC

2008-08-21T22:16:00.006-05:00

ABDC is ultimately rigged. Conspiracy theories, coincidences in all. An ode to the best crew this season is at hand. SoReal wasn't only fun to watch, but inspiring. I haven't danced in what seemed like ages before this show came along. I've been dancing since I lived in Mississippi all the way until we got to St. Louis, but with the scene being so MICROSCOPIC in STL, there wasn't a point. Virtually no dance exists outside of the nightclubs here... and you can't really even call that dance. SoReal undoubtedly makes me want to go out and find a studio and dance again. Man... shit is so wack. Even season 1 when Kaba Modern got eliminated by a "razor-thin margin"... shit was shady. So this elimination tonight was mos def not a shocker. SoReal, keep doing what you do best. And I'll be keeping an eye out for you, trust. Hope everything goes well in the future with you all, and just know you guys are the true winners.

With no further ado...

SRC.

Excuse the bitch in the background.
I'll be boycotting next season, definitely.

Long live the best of the season.
Cheers.

With SoReal Cru now demolished... that makes ABDC 0-2.

By Invitation Only

2008-08-19T23:16:00.003-05:00

Turn the playlist off for 10 minutes.

You're welcome.

Everything Is Grand In Wonderland, Until You Wake Up

2008-08-18T21:20:00.005-05:00

It's a nice line, I know. Because I wrote it.

I swear if you don't keep up with my LP blog, you're missing out. At least in my opinion. I write the best stories, I'll take your mind to a whole different plane. I mean... if everyone was an airplane, what would you be? Think about it. I'm saying... if you're ground level, I can get you high. If you're in a one-seated crop duster, I can fly you around the world in a concord jet. It's all relative. Even though I wasn't talking about that type of plane... I got a bit sidetracked. Forgive that.

Anyway, what's good world?

Great day today. Not too hot, not too cool. Just right. Had to go up to SIUE today to pick up my book rentals, talk to the CJ Dept. Board Director, and buy a parking permit. Only thing wrong with today is the lack of CJ 201 openings. I'm not entirely sure right now, but it may go into effect that I won't be able to declare my major in Spring '09... which could potentially place me in St. Louis for another 3 and a half years. I won't allow that to happen. So I have to re-email the CJ Dept. Director and get things straightened out and/or beg for my life.

Otherwise, everything was everything. Still looking for a job. It's pretty bad in the area when the only job openings around are only opened to certified personnel and college graduates. Even resorted to McDonald's and they're not hiring. Sad times.

Met some people today, nothing special. But who knows, they have potential. Either way, be on the look-out.

EDIT: I just read this: "Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree."

Guess what? That's bullshit, because I've been sitting & picking apples in the top of the tree for 7 years.

Out'cuh.

Top 5 - Dead or Alive

2008-08-15T21:40:00.015-05:00

I'm no necrophiliac.

I decided to start a new trend, and it will catch on like wildfire. Just you watch. I figure this will be interesting to see who people are truly attracted to. No use of current girlfriends, boyfriends, exes or anything of the sort. Strictly figures either famous (or not so famous), and aren't known by you directly. With no further ado; these are the top 5 individuals of the opposite sex I'm most attracted to in ascending order & the reasons why. Are you ready for this? 5 to 1.

Kiera Knightley

From the first time I saw her in Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, she had me hooked. This woman is not only sexy to me in a physical aspect, but the way she commands respect melts me. I seriously did not even begin to find white women attractive until she stepped on the scene. And even now, she's the only woman with a deficient amount of melanin I would put a ring on. From her roles in the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy to Domino, and finally to Atonement... she has me fucking addicted. Not to mention, her accent makes me cringe in a child-like joy EVERY time it graces my eardrums. This girl is a definite keeper in my book.

Eva Mendes

God damn. Fully-clothed, and still makes my jaw drop. She truly leaves me speechless. My Latin lover, my supreme queen. My wonderful baby boo schnookum pie sweet-cake honey buns. She is the first woman I have ever had a celebrity crush on. And for that, she is deserving of the number 4 spot on my list. Training Day was her first introduction to me, and I'll never forget her off that. Not only is she ridiculously exotic in my eyes, but she is hands down the most sensual woman I've ever laid eyes on. But that only goes so far... that's when her eyes take the lead. Her eyes completely destroy worlds, and I love them. She is (more than she knows), my future wife. I'm glad you got out of rehab and cleaned up! FUCK THAT. It's the way she proves she's human by making MISTAKES make her sexy in my eyes. Though, I am overly ecstatic you did that opening scene in We Own The Night! Oh, did I mention she's environmentally aware? Her PETA ad is classic. She ALMOST makes me want to be a vegan; then I remember I'm too cool for that bullshit.

Salma Hayek

asdfijaoisdj;foisdahioas;jflkdshfiuwghealkfnm,svczxiuhpoqwer[pejkwmklnfdughifdj!!!!!!!!!!! From Dusk 'Til Dawn, Fools Rush In, Dogma, Wild Wild West, Once Upon A Time In Mexico, countless TV spots and magazine ads. This women was a fucking obsession of mine for the greater part of 10 years of my life. Her accent kills me, she's intelligent, and she's stunningly beautiful. She oozes sexual prowess. She is SO nice and caring, it murders me. She's so attractive in an endless stream of ways. She's 41, and still looks like she's 23. I swear to you, if she didn't fuck up and marry that faggot and have his daughter... man. I'd wreck that into the new millenia. Non-fiction. Salma Hayek is God's gift to man. A goddess in her own respect. All I can hope for is that Valentina grows up to be HALF as gorgeous as her mother. (Only 18 years to wait! akekekekekekkee).

Riyo Mori

Never thought I'd say it, but this woman is the shit. There's nothing else to fucking say really. She's drop dead gorgeous, intelligent, ambitious, sexy, and sophisticated. Not to mention, she's the former Miss Universe 2007. God damn man, what kind of luck must you have to meet, court, and marry a woman like this? The lucky fuck that bags this one will be envied by me until my dying day. She's a role model for countless girls around the world, eloquent way beyond her TWENTY-TWO years, and extremely easy on my eyes. I bet she's BOMB in bed. -sigh. What is a love struck fool like myself to do?

Tamia

Dopedopedopedopedopedopedope. She is truly what I wish every woman on this earth was. Going far beyond her exterior, this woman bears her soul on her sleeve. The way this woman sings brings tears to my eyes, chills up my spine, and twists and contorts my soul in ways only the most wonderful of women could. She is the perfect fit to round out the top of my list. I am attracted to her beyond her Aphrodite, and lusting after her mind. I mean... look at her freckles! She is the ONLY women I know that can pull off freckles without looking like an out-casted, red-haired, slave-whipped step-child. She is so happy-go-lucky... but REALISTIC about life despite her social and economic status. I don't know how she does it, but she makes me want to walk the seven seas for her. Naw, I know how she does it... it's how utterly easy-going, limitless, and 'comfortable in her own skin' she portrays herself as being. THAT is sexy. She's goofy. She makes me laugh, even on some of her recordings she has skits and such that just make me smile. And they let me know she's actually a human being with a full understanding of humor. Everyone that knows me knows I have a sick sense of humor and they way to my heart is being able to make me laugh; Tamia easily does that. I used to say I was going to hire an assassin to take Grant Hill out so that her and I may lead a wonderful life together forever and always. I still plan on it. Grant, watch the fuck out, you have it coming to you. This guy is the luckiest man on the planet. I cannot express my jealousy in text, it's nigh impossible. If I had the chance to speak with Tamia one-on-one... dawg... I'd be speechless. I'd probably quiver with fear and hope to God she doesn't realize how much of an uber dork I am. Anyway, cheers to Tamia. The woman I am most attracted to, despite her being married. Long live the queen!

Didn't make the cut, but they emanate my style.

Patricia de Leon - Look her up and you'll see why she's a future contender. Classy, overly interesting, and genuine. But not as many years under her belt as others.

Sara Bareilles - Easily one of the most awe-inspiring singers I've come across. But, she's a tad 'new' on my front, so I had to hold back on giving her a prime position.

Benazir Bhutto - Former Prime Minister of Pakistan. Truly a genius in intuition and ambition with political processes. Changed the world, but left long before her time due to assassination. R.I.P.

EDIT: I didn't do this to show off "eye candy" or to be like omgwtfbbqherbodyissosexy. No. I did this more or less to let my thought process come across as to what I find attractive in a female. Whether it be their prowess shown through cinema, the changes they've made in the world or even their personal lives, the respect they demand and recieve, or the blatant soulfulness they portray... they are all sexy in my eyes. Not solely sexy in terms of the physical, but of the mental. Hopefully this won't be watered down into some stereotypical bullshit mess. Have fun with it. Credit given where credit is over-due, yes? Yes, I believe so.

Anyway, there it is. Simple enough, right? Think REALLY hard about what attracts you, and who the top 5 (for lack of a better term) celebrities are. List them whichever way you want, and show the inner circle. It'll be interesting to see what people find beautiful. No limits except the relationship stipulation. Hmmmmmmmm, 'til further notice!

Getatme,B.

You Can Die of Laughter

2008-08-14T23:19:00.006-05:00

Because I just did. I am fucking DYING laughing.

I'mma fucking try this joke out, SO much.

Columbia

2008-08-14T22:47:00.003-05:00

Elisa's back from the souf o' France. And it's weird because I missed her. It's weird to say the least. I mean, for me to miss someone to the extent I missed her to. Three fucking weeks though?

Right when she got back she showed me this, and we both laughed hysterically. I'm glad she's back though, bet.

Holler.

Have I Turned Into A Yeti?

2008-08-14T18:10:00.004-05:00

Since yesterday, when the Fable II Pub Games were released on XBOX Live Arcade, I've been getting a silly amount of messages concerning how to win. Simply put, every game is luck driven. There's no other way to counter casino-type games. So, as I woke my mulatto self to a semi-beautiful day to turn on my XBOX 360... I was startled by 15 messages from 15 different people I don't know asking the SAME question.

HOW DU U WINZ @ PUB GAYMZ?!

So, taking time out of MY day to relieve the amount of retards that message me... I made a thread at the direct source. The xbox.com forums.

-cue the cliche dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuuuuh music.

http://forums.xbox.com/22133722/ShowPost.aspx

Safe to say it is an EXTENSIVE post with tips, hints, and strategies for each of the games in this retarded XBLA title. Nope, I didn't spell check. Well, I'm sure I've helped a couple of people. I tried to be nice. Keyword: tried. Hopefully I came across as intelligent, lmfao. Actually now that I've checked, I have helped some people.

I guess I am a yeti.

One.

British Rock Therapy

2008-08-12T22:26:00.003-05:00

I'm pretty sure I used to rule the world in a past lifetime.

I don't take anything back, I've been humble for FAR too long.

It's time to get arrogant.

Ventilation

2008-08-12T16:10:00.009-05:00

Look what you made me do...

Niggas don't understand me in the slightest. Can't expect them to, simple minds aren't supposed to comprehend complex things. Easy logic, correct?

I agree. And I agree so much, that I don't believe I should be mingling with these said "simple" minds. Yes, I am making a proclamation that I am better than you, him, her, it, them. I am better. Prove me wrong. Only thing you probably have on me is that I'm a mean person. Blah @ that argument. I know I'm mean... naw not mean. I'm realistic. The world isn't just roses. Life isn't there "for the taking". And love is a make-believe fable. Get real, pessimism isn't wrong -- it's just BETTER.

Look what I made for YOU!

Really though? I despise people that have their life just PLANNED out for them. To the FUCKING 't'. It's truly upsetting, not only because their path is set. But because they have no worries.

Example: my brother, Mr. Bitch. Mr. Bitch has coasted through life with an ailment known as autism. Thing is, his autism is high-functioning. So he's like every other human being excluding his short attention span and need for practice with SOME social cues. Mr. Bitch has been coasting through life (Mississippi, Colorado, Hawaii, Florida, Illinois) with this ailment with NO real big sign of hindrance. Oh no, there are faked problems though. Hawaii; the schools were 'too hard' for Mr. Bitch, so we HAD to move away. Ok, fine... I can see that. Florida; Mr. Bitch gets into a fight 20 days before our father retires out of the ilitary and gets his ass kicked. 'Mr. Bitch' gets bullied in Florida, so we HAD to move away. Hold the fuck up. Trick me once, shame on you; trick me twice, shame on me. Bullied? GTFO. So since we're catering to Mr. Bitch, let's just buy him whatever he wants! Let's excuse the bullshit of EXTREME magnitude he causes! Let's even excuse his lack of family values and morals at all for that matter! Let's just give him a free pass through life! Mr. Bitch has not worked a day of his life, but has a more stable income than me. Mr. Bitch sits around the house and eats the whole fucking pantry each day, but he gets whatever food he wants. Mr. Bitch finds himself in a dilemma similar to a situation I was in maybe a few months prior. But he is completely excused from it, and I was punished HARSHLY. Yes, it's fair. Mr. Bitch doesn't have to help pay for his college tuition, but I have to. I hope you burn in fucking Hell.

Knew if I paid my dues...

Free shit. Everyone seems to win free shit. Get free shit. Get gifts. Whatever the case. The shit doesn't make me salty, it makes me angry. It ties DIRECTLY into the free-ride shit. It just appalls me that I can get shitted on constantly by what some people call "fate" or "God"... or even "karma", and other people can be showered with "blessing" at all times.

I've bought presents for my family every year, birthdays and Christmas. I mean, even fucking Mother's/Father's Day. What do I get? Nothing. Funniest shit is, I don't get it from ANYBODY! Fuck, I take that back. Elisa has made a pretty strong case for the past two years to make sure she cheers me up. But other than that, nothing note-worthy. My grandparents forget my birthday. As do my aunts & uncles... DESPITE me sending their fucking kids shit. Man, maybe I should just shit on everyone so they can feel what I feel. "Oh, niggas forgot about me again? Maybe a card is in the mail, or they've been too busy for a phone call to give me some well wishes." Man, whatever. It makes a nigga feel SO unappreciated. Unknown almost. My parents don't acknowledge me on my birthday, pretty hysterical. Because they take the day off every year, almost as an excuse for a vacation day. My brother doesn't remember, nor gets me anything. Despite the 100-200 dollars I spend on him for his birthday 15 days later. You know, I wouldn't even need to be acknowledged on my birthday. How about just a, "Hey Noah, how are you today?" That would be nice. So a mother fucker would know he isn't just looked over.

How will they pay YOU?

Not well, especially when jobless. It makes no sense really. Over the past 2 months I have applied to about 300 DIFFERENT businesses in a 10 mile radius. I've gotten ONE call back. That was two weeks ago. Amazing shit.

Especially when I consider myself as a whole. I'm a phenomenal worker, I am rarely late (and only late if some emergency happens), I learn stupid quick, I'm efficient, and I have the personality. I mean what the fuck. I lose jobs to deadbeats, single-mothers, fat fucks, teenagers in high school, ex-felons, scrubs, and even senior citizens. It's getting to be a tad ridiculous. I'm stuck in this HELL HOLE of a house/location, with nothing to do now except stare at the wall and wait for about 60 more credit hours in college to magically fall under my belt. I am bored to tears, but I can't. Because if I cry, I'm about as homosexual as any of you faggots that claim to read anything I write. Only fucking remembered when I'm gone, shit makes no sense. Anyway, I just want a job. Give a nigga a chance. I have a silver tongue, I am blessed with the gift of speech and persuasion. WHAT ELSE MORE DO YOU WANT? Not to mention, I need to get away from this rat's nest for the majority of the day. I don't want to see these people. I don't want to be around them. School, work, sleep. That's it. Fucking not to mention, I'll be having to pay for my college tuition out of my pocket and Miles won't; seeing as how I'm the bastard son.

Fuck you.

I don't care who you are. Race/nation/creed, fuck you. Tip of the iceberg type of shit right here, and I'm sure I could classify you within 5 minutes of conversation. I hate you, and it's not an over exaggeration. TRUST me. Fuck you. If you're happy-go-lucky like certain Asians I know, or mellow like some fucking Hispanics I know, or even jittery like some coke-head Whites I know, fuck you. Being optimistic in my direction is not the fucking route to go, trust me. Especially when you say how great your life is, or how lucky you are that you got XYZ item. Or maybe you're complaining to me how HORRIBLE your life is along the lines of: having a job but you not liking the work, how your family doesn't understand you, or how your perfect relationship has a minor kink in it. Just DON'T do it. Not in my direction. Because I can assure you, my life is 20, if not 500x worse. Granted I'm not out on the street, but I guarantee being on the street it would be easier for me to find fucking food to scavenge than in this house... much less survival. I'm constantly blamed for everything under the sun, never believed, and fucking exhausted of shit. Don't tempt me, don't FUCKING comment. I'll be sure to hurt your fucking feelings. Understood?

Ok.

Fuck it, I'm joining the military.

Brief Interlude

2008-08-12T12:36:00.004-05:00

No one is hiring, but when they are hiring --
All they hire are porch monkeys, black whores with 5 kids a piece, and ex-felons.

Oh, and fuck all you people bragging how great your life is.

Die very slow deaths.

Comments aren't required, fall the fuck back.

A.W.O.L.

2008-08-10T17:58:00.002-05:00

For an undetermined amount of time.

GDI - The Haiku

2008-08-09T05:02:00.008-05:00

I want Fable 2
But I have no currency
I need a new job

October 21.

EDIT: Silver tongue trumps the Queen of the house. Pre-ordered LE.

-takes a bow.

Geeks, Nerds, & Dorks... Oh My!

2008-08-05T11:41:00.006-05:00

Sigh.

The highlight of that picture is obscenely obvious. It's obviously not my watered down winamp playlist. It's not the cluttered desktop. So it's OBVIOUSLY the other window up.

Yes, yes. If you didn't know by now, I'm a complete nerd. Yes, yes. I'm re-installing World of Warcraft. But don't judge me yet! I have valid reasons as to why I'm doing so.

Shit, I haven't played the game (which is STILL installing) for over 6 months. But that is not the reason why I am re-installing it. No feeling of nostalgia here! No, my cousin and aunt talked me into doing this. You see, Gabe (my cousin) has two sons. Steven & Gabe Jr. (Gabe Jr. came second, but that's another story). Long story short, their mother is a complete crack whore bitch and they need some positive influence in their life.

Hold up... Disc 1 is done, need to insert Disc 2.

Anyway, my aunt bought them World of Warcraft and they are in LOVE with it. Word got out (thanks mom) that I used to play this jasdhb;oiiaDOJKKLJASDF;LJF game, and they thought it was a good idea that I chauffer them around. Eh, I have no problem with that. Though, I have been HEAVILY procrastinating. So, then word got out I have two end-game characters, and the kids are going berserk. In turn, I have to install today and go and play this game with them.

I hope it's as interesting as I remember it... as long as the kids don't catch me slurring profanities off to someone on game, it's all good. (^_^)v

Me & Tochi shitting around x2.

It's a cool game, if you're not anal retentive. And if you're a smoker. The prior two screen shots are of two boss downings. It's just Tochi (the main tank), and I (the main melee damage) havin' a little fun & /flex'ing in front of our kill.

Anyway, if you happen to play this god-forsaken game... PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE comment and make me feel less of a social outcast. Knawmeannn?!?!

Deuces!

Tyraid

2008-08-03T22:35:00.012-05:00

COMING SOON.

And it's here.

I'm tired of various shit going on, so let me just run them down one by one. If this hurts feelings, fuck you. Man up.

"I need to pee/I'm on my period."

Sorry to inform you, but I don't need to hear that. And it's not just with any specific woman. It's every woman on the face of the earth. They all feel the need to tell me when they need to urinate or when the lining of their uterus is shedding. How about you all shut the fuck up, and find someone else to tell your bodily functions to? Do I tell you every time I have a hard-on from thinking about Eva Mendes? No, I don't. Because it would be frowned upon by you. The same way I look down on women when they speak reckless like that. I mean damn, I had Health class in elementary, middle, high school, and college. I'm sure you have to pee SOMETIME during the day. And I understand you have a period. Awesome, let's leave it at that.

Gay people.

You are all annoying as shit. Whether it's a guy posting about how in love he is with another guy's sex (NOOOOO BROKEBACK), or a guy hitting on me as I walk through the mall; you need to stop it. Same goes for the females, the lesbian shit sickens me as well. It's not cute, it's not cool, it's not socially acceptable. If it were socially acceptable, you'd all be able to get married to each other and butt-fuck each other to your heart's content. But that's not the case, because the shit is frowned upon. And it won't be in OUR lifetime that we see society's frown turn upside-down, faggots. I am [] <<--- that close to building a hydrogen bomb, and firing it over San Francisco so your rainbow fag flag capital will lie in ruin and you all won't know what to do. Also, the undercover gayness. You need to cease & desist with the steadfast QUICKNESS. All you undercover homos (you disgusting creatures know who you are, MALE & FEMALE) need to just keep the shit in the closet. "Bisexuality" as well. Guess what? There's no such thing. Pick a side. Sexual orientation isn't a 'sit on the fence' type of deal. Either you stick your dick in the ass of a male, or you're sticking your dick in a vagina. Not BOTH at the same time. It is impossible.

Fucking disgusting.

Females whom think they're smarter than males.

It is unfortunately a fallacy. For one, the world is a male dominated planet. We all know this. Two, you niggas still get paid less than males on average just off your gender. If you're smarter, why haven't there been any huge social reforms organized and platformed to correct this? Even black people on welfare are making more money than you. Three, no female was a part of the Manhattan project. If you don't know what THAT is, you just proved my point. DON'T TRY TO GOOGLE IT NOW, you already proved yourself to be dumber than a man.

Promises.

I hate people who make promises and don't keep them. Especially ones which hold IMPORTANCE to me. Be it of small or large importance. It's still important. So if you promise you'll do something for me, do it. Don't sit on your ass for 4 months and pretend like you'll ever do it. Because in reality (you know, the world where shit comes to bite you back on the butt) I'm going to dick you over ten times as hard just because I remember you shitted on me with your broken promise. I don't give a fuck what you say about karma, I don't believe in it. You dumb fucking Hindus. I hold grudges, and the people who have broken their promises to me have it coming to them tenfold.

Nagnagnagnagcomplainbitchmoaaaaaaan.

If you couldn't tell, that's the female mating call. That's ALL they do. If something can't be provided for them, that's what noise they make. And the funniest part is, they don't realize it's just noise. Then they get mad when us males tune them out. Please, spare us all. Go cut yourself and jump off a very high cliff.

Expectations women have for men.

As learned from history, there is one GREAT man about every 500 years. Julius Caesar, Jesus, Atila the Hun, George Washington, Henry the VIII, King David, Napoleon, Brad Pitt. By the way, congrats Brad on baggin' Angelina. That's the only reason you're great. Anyway, you can't expect XYZ dude to be great. Brad Pitt has already filled the next 500 year void of greatness. Ok? Don't expect XYZ dude to whisk you away from your problems. Don't expect him to become a lawyer and get you out the hood. Don't expect him to even dick you right. Because in truth, a woman's expectations are too high. Even if the sex was great, it wouldn't be in your eyes... because your expectations are THAT much higher. Fuck you for expecting too much out of a man. And that's just the TIP of the iceberg.

Lastly, conversation.

In truth, I love a woman's conversation. It has it's high points. But boy, oh boy... does it have it's low points. i.e. gossip. Women can't keep their lips from spreading rumors, lies, or stories about anyone. "Did you hear about blahblahblah?" "Well I HEARD she did this with him blahblahblah." Ok. Congrats to dude, why are you telling me? Also, ex-girlfriends that call... what is the purpose? I don't want you around, lose my number. I understand you're bi-polar, clingy, etc. But I want nothing to do with you. Let's leave your mental conditions over where you're at, I have a one personality life to lead over HERE. Then again, it's not only females that do it. It's also the bitch ass males as of late. If you have something to say to me, mother fucker say it. Don't tell your "homeboy/girl" and let it come around my way. Especially in this circle of people. You know it's going to run the usual route, why hide it? You bitch ass niggas.

Yessir. Again, if I hurt feelings... I highly suggest you reach down around your crotch area and check if you have a vagina. If so, go cry in a corner. GG.

(^_^)v

One.

COPYRIGHT ©

2008-08-03T10:06:00.002-05:00

(^_^)v

Copywritten.

No bullshit.

Online Fighting Games Are SO Blaine

2008-08-01T21:13:00.007-05:00

I just laid waste to a nigga
40 levels higher than me on XBOX LIVE.

With my CUSTOM character, with trash gear.

I WISH WISH WISH I had my camera on me mayn.

Come get it son.

EDIT: There's alot more I want to type, but I'm too damn lazy.

Too bad online fighting games are gay.

(^_^)v

Awkward +7

2008-07-31T15:27:00.005-05:00

I just left that interview. Boyyyy, I was fresh.

If yeen know, I had an interview at Toys R' Us today at 2:30PM. Pretty lame, but anything is better than this gig at the military base. I get no hours anymore whatsoever, fuck them niggggggerrrrssssssss.

It was a group interview, which was pretty gay. Usually when they take people in groups everyone is hired and it's like yeahhhh whuz goooooddddd!? Not the case here.

Walked in at 2:15PM with this tall stocky dude named Matt. Got to the lil' break area they were conducting the group session and the silence fell across the room. I mean shit, it was competition. Two more people came in before 2:30, but they were both scrubs. Some white kid named Mike. Mike is one of those white kids that acts black. EVERYONE knows what I'm talking about, don't front like you're oblivious. LOL @ baby blue Dickie shorts and a white tee. With some old ass AF1s. I almost cried. Then Ashley stepped in. Mixed girl with a gut the size of Buddha. Holy shit, she needs to hit the gym proper. I would've probably holler'd at her if her body didn't look like the star monster of The Blob.

Anyway, the interview was awkward. We started despite the 5th person showing up. Ehhh, their loss. Niggas made us go out into the store and find a toy, then come back and explain why we picked that toy and try to sell add-ons/accessories.

I picked this Fisher-Price jawn, some pirate ship. I forget what the line is called. ImagiNEXT maybe? Mike picked a Star Wars light saber. -_-
Matt picked a Louisville slugger, and Ashley picked up some toy her SON plays with. (What an unfair advantage that shit was.)

Anyway, after that bullshit, we had to to a mock 'Thank You' speech. i.e. "You just won best supporting actor at the Oscars". Cake really, especially when I was the only one who included my "team" as a thank you. Everyone else thanked God & family. Stupid mediocre in MY opinion.

Then came one-on-one interviews. Come to find out Mrs. Carol is only hiring one person out of us four. GREATTTTTTTTT. 25% chance. So, I don't even find out if I get the job until next week, IF THAT. Blah. Fuck it. At that point I was kind of ticked, and in my anger I left the fucking Pirate Ship in the break room and left the store. But I feel my interview went well. I have two legs up over them niggas. Only fucking problem was Ashley and her extensive knowledge on toddler toys due to the fact she spread her legs and got pregnant like every other bitch in the area.

-twirls finger in the air and rolls eyes

Otherwise, chill-mode today. Get at me B.

EDIT!!!

Mayn, I'mma go up to my ma's office and go cop some Jack -N- The Box.
Who wants some? And as a reminder... SIGN-UP FOR SELECTIVE SERVICE. It's the fucking law. They hold back IRS checks because of it. Military jail seems fun, but I'd rather not be on the inside of their holding cells this time.

My parents have HELL to pay.

FUCK OFF! @ the date of registration. t(-__-;t)

One.

Dopest Shit Out

2008-07-30T09:47:00.010-05:00

PAUSE THE PLAYLIST AND WATCH THIS.

Dopest song/video out NOW.

Gnarls Barkley has been a favorite of mine since DJ Danger Mouse and Cee-Lo teamed up. Even before Cee-Lo was a part of the duo, he was dope. As was Danger Mouse (you know, GREY Album fame).

The song is a SICK metaphor and reality for most ended relationships. And although the whole background behind the video is cliche' with the whole break-up situation, EVERYONE can relate to it. The video is nothing less than epic, and the song is ridiculously hot.

I expect nothing less from Gnarls Barkley.

Give the video a chance, watch its full duration. Go download the song. And when the album drops, cop it! It's building up to be a great Fall/Winter session for music. Support the cause!

Otherwise, I'm on chill until my next class at 12:15.

Another entry is written in the LP blog, make sure you peep it. You can tell by the tone who it's for. ANYWAY, hit me up on Y! . I need some conversation before my next class.

OH, OH, OH.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MILES!

What I copped for the kid, I OD'd with just that.

You're 18 now, gah damn. I remember when you were a young'n. Cool times god, I just can't believe you're an adult now. From Mississippi to Hawaii you've had my back despite all the snakes & bitches. You're the one constant, and I can't thank you enough for being there trough the valleys and peaks. I have your present stashed away, so when you read this just ask where it is. You know I couldn't forget you, even if you didn't get me anything. Let's have a fantastic day, and go watch The Dark Knight together.

Congratulations on your completion of your first semester of college. You're summing up to be a greater man than I could ever be. I've always said that, so take it to heart. You're built for great things, even if you can get on my final nerve at times. Stay cool, calm, & collected like the eldest and I assure you; you will make your mark soon enough. Keep your head up! Happy Birthday once again!

Peace.

Checklist

2008-07-29T13:15:00.028-05:00

Ayo, ayo, ayo!!!!

This ain't for you.

Introduction (2 pages)
- Thesis (Completed)
Historical/Explanatory Section (1 1/2 pages)
Point of Argument (1 page)
Negative Critique (2 pages)
Strawman (1 1/2 pages)
Positive Critique (1 1/2 pages)
Conclusion (1/2 page)
Transition Paragraphs (Completed)
Abstract (Completed)
Outline (Completed)
Title Page (Completed)
Works Cited Page (Completed)
Relaxation!

10-12 page paper, then supplementary pages.

Then I'll be done. LMFAO!!!

EDIT: Done at 12:05 AM. Kiss my ass, yo. 10 pages when each section is tallied up, then the transitional paragraphs push that to 11+. Supplemental pages don't apply to the page count, but they're done as well. Give me THAT shit, nigguh! Now all I have to do is print them off in the morning after I put page numbers on the paper.

Holler.

Call Me The Bad Guy

2008-07-28T16:09:00.006-05:00

LOL SOCIALVIBE SPELLED ADOBE WRONG!

Man, I'm not good at being nice. But I guess this deserves a few lines. Aside from the next picture...

You mos def deserve it. Despite what everyone else says/thinks about the photo. (If Carmine did the GFX, I'll stab myself.) But otherwise! Times have been tough, I know. Keep your chin up kid, you'll get through it. Everyone does. I mean, I'm a prime example. Now you have a new camera, and some new photoshopz! I hope you don't let the next camera in the hands of your sister.

(^__^;)v

In other news, I'm deathly bored beyond my own ability to recooperate myself. I've tried looking through my DVD collection... to no avail. Found a DRAGON MAKER... but it's kinda gay. I even got on Y! and pulled up multiple windows to stave off my boredom! (Excuse the windows of Y! on the bottom bar in that first picture by the way.)

I'm just stupid bored.

I do have a Research paper due at 8:30 AM on Wednesday... maybe I should get that done.

I may be back to add some stuff to this post, maybe not. We'll see in the near future. But if I don't! You can always holler at a holler at a, holler at a playerrrrrrrr.

Well fuck it, I may as well hype my own self up.

If you don't have socialvibe, click MY link on the right side of the page. Lizzy doesn't need any more points, she's already in the top 500. And she's won shit, fuck her. <3 So, if you don't have socialvibe, help this mixed-breed kid out. Ya feelz me?

Ok, now I may return to finish this... <_<;.

Best Political Ad Forever

2008-07-24T22:07:00.007-05:00

This is SO classic.
You're lying if you don't think so.

ENOUGH SAID.

Best part of the ad is, it helps to shine light on why people are voting for him. You niggas don't even KNOW that he's been flip-flopping on his political platform since he's been elected as an Illinois State Senator in 1997! And even FURTHER MORE since 2004 when he was elected as one of the two Senators to represent IL in the U.S. Senate! LOL, but you're going to vote for him. Oooooookay. Go ahead, vote for him because he's black. Vote for him because he'll give all Blacks a pedestal and reparations checks. Vote for him because he'll bring change by sitting on the fence with most issues in America he's presented with. Go 'head, do THAT.

May come back and edit this later though.

Anyway...

Here's a conclusion to this post for you niggas.

It seems blogspot is a new "fad" in the internet world. So, if you find a nigga's blog like hmmmmm... let's say mine. And you enjoy it. Introduce yourself if you're commenting. If you're on some daily basis shit, looking at my blog on some daily basis shit, being linked through Lizzy or Mai's blogs... shorty, don't bother.

I don't want to be a part of this extended circle, and to be honest if yeen got anything beneficial to me; you can go ahead and fuck off. In truth, you niggas that just suddenly started hitting me out of the blue because "reading everyone on everyone's lists blogs" is the new fucking trend, you all need to die an extra super-snail slow death. It's NOT the business, no matter HOW cool you think you are because you have XYZ amount of people on your "blogs I read" section in the span of two months. Y'all are mad shallow, and I can't keep ignorance in my circle 'cuh. So back down for a couple minutes. Re-evaluate why you're actually sitting here looking at 30+ people's blogs a day, and fall back. If you're commenting my shit, and I ain't comment you first... or you just state your ignorant opinion on my comments. I'm gonna air your silly ass out.

Otherwise, that's all.

Expect Diamonds soon.

Holler.

SIUE Is For Power Walkers

2008-07-22T18:08:00.009-05:00

Watch the WHOLE thing.

Hi haters!

Sike naw, what up though? Haven't updated in what seems like forever, so let me get down to business.

I went up to my 4-year college for an appointment that I thought was at 9:30 AM. It was really at 9:00 AM. Lucky I got up stupid early. (That was TRULY a fluke). But, instead of having the 'academic adviser' I was assigned to... good thing, because she was an uptight Amazon bitch anyway. I got this black lady as a counselor! LOL THAT'S A STEP DOWN. IM KIDDEN IM KIDDEN SHE WUZ COOL. Lol, let me stop. She was really informative. Told me that I can get a General Education waiver after this semester I'm in is done (in 8 days to be exact). Which MEANS, I don't have to do shit as far as SIUE's curriculum. I have 61? credit hours. And for the program I'm going into, you need something like 26 credit hours of 'free electives'. I have 29 hours, thank Goddddddddd. So I don't have to do anymore bullshit like basket-weaving. I sure as hell was running out of options.

But yeah, I got dicked out of my schedule for my Fall '08 semester. It seems everyone got to apply in April when they opened up. Well, the information I sent to SIUE (transcripts, money, and application) were all just sitting on a fucking desk for 5 months. Oh, but they cashed the check. So I got dicked out of registering for classes, and my classes are spread out to hell. Well, only on Monday. I still need to register for one more class, and I want it to be Spanish. But when I try to register, it says I don't have the PREREQ. I mean, wtf... I just sat through a Spanish 101 course in Spring '08... better let me fucking register by the weekend.

Worst part of the day by far... the Parking Services office. Why was their office the worst part, you ask?

http://www.siue.edu/MATH/conference2002/info-pack/SIUE_map_large.pdf

THAT IS THE SOLE REASON WHY.

Look at the fucking campus map. The cheapest Parking permit is $89. And that's for Parking lots P4-11. Which is hilarious, because P4-8 are like a mile away from any building of significance with classrooms, and 9-11 are around buildings like the early child development center. WTF. So, there's another permit for $131, which would let me park in the F category, which is RIGHT BY THE GYM AND ALL MY CLASSES. And it would also allow me to park in C, B, and P1-3 lots after 3 PM. Which would be LOVELY.

I bring this up to ma dukes, and it goes NOWHERE. She's truly a cold-hearted caucasian bitch. Man, let me stop. I'm lying right there. She's a caucasian and native-american supremist racist bitch. MY BAD. Shorty won't shell out $42 so I don't have to cross 4 lanes of inward and outbound highway traffic? So I won't have to walk a mile to my class each time I drive the 35 minutes to go up there Mondays, Wednesdays, and POSSIBLE Fridays?

Mayn, fuck you.

I guess I'mma have to do like Carmine and skateboard my ass to classes. Which is fine, I haven't been on a skateboard in 5 years, but goddamn. Ayo Carmine! What's good with a board with one of those designs you posted a while back? I'm gon' try and be fresh at least. Heh, I'm in the process of gathering my clothes to sell them at Pluto's Closet tomorrow. If you don't know what it is, look it up. I'm tired of explaining it.

I may join a fraternity to piss my moms off. Iota Psi? Theta looks like a good choice of colors. I mean, it was either "red & ugly maroon, ewwww gold too!" as Lizzy said, fagtastic purple & yellow, or yellow and black. Guess I'mma do that to get her heated, cause the bitch won't shell out 40 dolares to get me closer to the gym and shit. Fucking slut.

On a lighter note...

Just look at the top left doe.

I'm the shit, and you're not.

LIZZY!************

If you see this before the interview, hit me up! I have some questions you could slur off at her! Otherwise, good luck! I know it'll be good.

Holler back young'n.

Whoo, whoo !

GNOES! AZN PLAGUE!

2008-07-17T18:47:00.007-05:00

Hacking is the shit, I must say. Though I did not actually DO it this time, I am sure I can get the hang of it. So today I woke up, felt the heat of the Middle Tennessee on my face, and decided it was time for a change. Took the hair up a few several inches. Very much satisfied with the end result. No, this isn't Noah, it's Mai. Missed me, yes? I know I missed you all too. Blah blah, mushy mushy.

On to better things, got the job I went to today. Yay for me. Start next week with paper work and orientation. My uncle is here from California. My father and him have been on the move. Each one with a beer in their hands. Men right? Well, last night my older brother and my cousin Danny stopped by and they all were going to go out. My mother asked where they were going and my uncle said "to go grab on girls butts and stuff." LOL. Man, I missed him so much. My uncle reminds me of that man that used to host Family Feud. Always kissing on all the womeniz. Crazy man.

So Noah got his pink Socialvibe ball, uh, fuck you? Lizzy is going to send me one of hers. And quit calling us nerds. AND I hope your Xbox thing console breaks again, so then you are ultimately forced to talk to me EVEN MORE because I tickle your fancy. (no homo?) LOL. Not sure if that little disclaimer was needed or not. I guess that's a man law or something. Yes, I have actually accepted that there is a list of rules/guidelines that you men have to follow which is completely fine. Do you, right? But I think the high five guideline is bullshit, I mean I like high fives? =]

FACTS ABOUT NOAH TIME?!?!

1. He's not as cool as he perceives
2. Because I'm the COOLEST; he's in denial.
3. He said the cutest thing about me today.
4. By the way, what he said made me smile & such.
5. Still hate him because he has that pink ball BEFORE ME.
6. he's weird
7. he's weird
8. he's weird

Ah, enough about him. More about me. Yeah! Well, I just lost my train of thought...Found it! Switching cell phone carriers soon. Verizon ftw? No more T-mobile. Palm Centro is the name of the phone.

Unfortunately, VERIZON only has this ugly ass "Cobalt blue" color. But they should have different colors soon. I'll just upgrade or something then. But the phone itself is darling to look at.

You can thank me later for making your blog more nerdy, Noah! ♥

MUY Bueno

2008-07-16T09:17:00.008-05:00

Ahhhhhhhhhhh, I'm too much a nerd. This is actually the SECOND blog post in succession. I'm just so fucking bored that I'm posting again. Lemme share some electronic stuff with you son.

Final Fantasy XIII is going to be released for the 360. Well damn, one more reason why I don't have to cop a PS3. That shit is overpriced anyway. Look at that screenshot, Jehovah. Too realistic, it's SO stylish. I'm loving it. I've been out of the whole RPG genre for a while due to my sick skeelz in FPS-games. But it's looking like XIII will get me back into the game. Again, look at the goddamn graphics!

Sure, if she wasn't pixelated I'd fuck her.

Hol' up...
...doing research for my 10-12 page paper due in 2 weeks.
Let me get back.

Like I said earlier though, make sure you click OLDER POSTS. This ain't the first one for the day; morning for that matter. But let's delve back in.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

I'm in LOVE.

Megaman 9 for XBLA (X-Box Live Arcade for all you lame asses out there that aren't hip to the culture), are you shitting me? Megaman was something I was raised on! Nostaaaaalllllgiaaaaaaaaaaaa. I'm lovin' it. There's more money I'll be spending. <345

Eye-orgasm +20.

Left4Dead. Valve's new game coming out for the 360/PC. Survival Horror genre. Has me amped for it. Best part is, 4-player online co-op. Ohhhhhhhh buddy. Shooting zombies with my closest of kin? You better fucking believe it.

I strong-arm niggas E. Honda styleeeeeeeeeee!

Last but not least. ZOMGWTFBBQ. Street Fighter IV. Another line of games I grew up on. I still play Street Fighter Alpha 3 on my PSP. Even copped my PSP from a distributor in Hong Kong so I could cop the game and play it. This mess looks SO fresh right now. By the way, Ken > Ryu. For 1, Ken is American; we all know Asians fail. 2, he's rich. 3, he's a fucking pimp; I know you like to set versus matches on his stage because of all the lavish intricacies & bitches at his mansion. All in all, Cammy is the best. I think all the nerd-heads can agree on that.

Anyway, I need to go out on a quick break, smoke, and come do a little research. Make sure to look at BOTH posts! CLICK OLDER POSTS. This is just the geek-side of me jumping out on the page. And if you got a 360 with a gamertag that plays online... look to the right of the page and add me. I'm an ill individual, non-fiction. I swear, E3 brings out the dork in me.

Sayonaraaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Bueno

2008-07-16T08:30:00.004-05:00

Yo! Real talk.

I'm a GOLIATH in Japan.

Sitting in class right now, stupid bored.

INTERLUDE:
Thanks for the Happy Birthday wishes mayn, if yeen see the video I posted from yesterday (hit Older Posts). Much love, it was appreciated.

The whole gist of this class period is the class being 'introduced' to the library and their search engines. The whole problem with this, at least for me, is that I've been through this lecture in the library over ten times now. It's a complete blow-off class for me. Glad I'm only half awake.

DRONEDRONEDRONEONPLZMAKEITSTOP.

R.O.A.D.S. update!

I have the beats all on my PC at home. Oh Lawdyyyy, they're too fantastic. My producer really outdid himself for me. Seems he has a ton in amount of faith that I'll do his production proper justice.

Maybe I'll post some of the tagged beats and put them on the similartohaze playlist so you can take listens to them so you get a very broad feel for what things will sound like. As... (just lost my train of thought). Yeah, when I get home I'll unlock the other blog and give you a listen. If you're interested.

Fuck man, why is errything I do so substantial?

Except my blogger HTML. I hate HTML. It's not my forte. I mean, it's so bland right now. The general scheme I like, I think I just don't like my uhhhh my uhhhhhh like background and shit. May work around that when I get to the residence as well. Seems easy enough.

In other news, it seems I'm the only person over eighteen that doesn't have a credit card (meaning no credit). Which is no bueno. Was looking at personal birthday presents for myself last night, and got hung up on wanting my own cell phone plan. That LG 8800VX Venus is too classy.

Sure, it has no QWERTY keyboard. Wow holy shit, I just realized why they call it a QWERTY keyboard. ROFLCOASTER IN LAWLLERLAND IN PWNSYLVANIA. That's crazy, hahaha. I guess I'm late. But I haven't txt'd in about 3 years. So I don't think it would be a big deal to me as far as messaging... and you can't expect me to know what a QWERTY is, geez.

I figure I'm just going to order a ZUNE original today. 265 dolares well spent. 80GB for that price, that's sexy. I was looking at iPod TOUCHes last night... 314 euros for 32 GB? Man... that's DOUBLE a ZUNE, but with a ZUNE I get 48 more GB. Which will hold my 13,000+ song library off the bat! That's love.

Mayn, let me end this. I could go on forever due to the vast amount of boredom this librarian projects vocally. But, I'll finish this. Non-fiction! Non-fiction sounds so much better than 'true story' & 'real talk'. You heard it here FIRST. You can jock it, just don't deny you got it from me.

Feel me?

Hasta noche, putassssssss.

Omega

2008-07-15T00:04:00.003-05:00

I only have one candle to light
Puff, puff, no passing; happy born day to I.

20 doesn't feel any different.

Psi

2008-07-14T15:18:00.005-05:00

Fuck the other post (Chi), I didn't ever really plan on finishing that one. It was spur of the moment, and was just going to speak on some new improvements with various shit going on with me. But I'll save that for another time.

Moving along.

First order of business, the wedding!

Mayn, I'm not even sure if I should release these pictures... or at least not all of them until I get everyone's pictures from the reception and such. But here's a quick run-down of events.

Firstly, the 3 and a half hour drive to Dyersburg, TN. Son, I was DYING in that bitch. With no mp3 player present, I was forced to watch DVDs of shit I've seen 100 times prior to this trip. Thank God for portable DVD players + Alice in Wonderland, Hero, & Kill Bill Vol. 1. It's surprising how sickly KB Vol. 1 is as you watch it more and more. I mean, I actually counted each person she killed out of the Crazy 88s, and she actually put down 88 Asians. Uma Thurman is my fucking role model.

Secondly the "hotel". Lololzozlool. It had a "pool" at least. Got my swim on. Their "hot breakfast" was super lame to say the least. Their eggs... were like hardboiled eggs. So I trekked my ass down the way...

Fuck I'll be right back. I have to go escort these noobs to see Hancock.

...back to business. Went to a different hotel, jacked their breakfast. Tried coffee for the first time, coffee isn't for me. Trust that. Don't understand the coffee hype. Maybe it's just me.

And then, the wedding at 4 PM. It took 20 minutes in total. Thank God... hol' up! A nigga had to take pictures. "Oh Noah, you're my favorite cousin! You guys HAVE to stick around!" She's lucky I have MAD love for her. Maybe I'll post a pic of her and me later. Much later.

After the fam' bam group pictures, then came the reception. Quaint place, it was cool. Was there for about a hour and a half, then I found the wine. Downed two bottles for dolo in about 45 minutes. I was so far gone. But ehhh, I had fun at least on my behalf. Danced, the whole nine. I can't remember anything past the talk with Daniel, the Village People, and asking Ashley to dance/watching Mary and Kendra do their duet. SMH, don't ask. So I figured I blacked out.

Guess I was wrong. I wake up to my parents pissed at me because I'm "a silly drunk" and my mother hates that. Blah blah, long story short. I cussed the whole family out, my true feelings towards the three came to light and they didn't like it. End of that discussion. Oh, oh, oh. And they expect me to apologize and vow to never drink again. I don't do promises B, ever. So after Hancock at the movie theatre today, I got scorned to Hell & back thanks to Miles bringing that situation back up.

Something about...

"I wonder why noone wore a white suit to the wedding."
Uh, because it's mad tacky?
You'd have to be fresh like me to pull some shit off like that.
"You weren't fresh on the car ride home."
EVERYONE JUMPING IN TO MAKE SNIDE REMARKS.
Yeah? Fuck you, you, and you.
TABLE FELL SILENT, AND I WALKED OUT.

I really don't have time for the bullshit. I blacked out. If I cussed you out, sorry? That's all I can do/say. I mean, I can't remember anything past the Village People. Keep bringing it up nigga, one more time. I'm sure I can muster another slew on slurred profanities to crush your already low-self esteem. Fucking shit. How many times do I have to apologize? I'm sure if I remembered shit clear as day, I would be able to recount how horrific it was at least from your perspective. But I truly don't know what was said, what I did past that point in time already addressed, or anything else. If I hurt your feelings, I truly am sorry and hope you can see past that in the very near future. I'm not a drinker, never have been and never will be. But Jesus, does this shit have to be ran into the ground? Forgive and forget, or fuck off.

Either way, here's a picture.

I give no shit what they say. I was fly throughout the night.

I'll get back to you tomorrow after I smoke, and everything dies down. I don't think I'll be doing anything tomorrow, there's just no point anymore.

One.

Chi

2008-07-10T16:16:00.001-05:00

I'm the mother fucking shit, ask your mother.

SHE knows 'bout me.

But only if she's hot. Yeah, only if she's hot.

I'll be back to finish this jawn.

Phi

2008-07-08T12:35:00.004-05:00

I may as well continue my Upsilon post.

And to be truthful, there is much to say. But most of what I want to say is hard to articulate in a way it comes across the way I want it to be perceived. So let me light up this Newport real quick, calm my nerves, and I'll begin.

Looking back on my last post, it seems I aimed it in the wrong light.

Let me rephrase.

Square one - puff, puff, puff.
Me & you. I don't know what you have to say or want to say. But you said it. You even said you didn't know what half the things you said yourself even meant. Don't worry, half of the things I said I didn't know what I was getting at. But I'm talking about a good 5 years ago. You're talking in the present tense. I don't know what you want from me. I know what I want from you though. I know I ended the relationship, and I know every reason why. Do you though? I didn't run my mouth like you may think. I only asked advice of 2 people, and one of those 2 being my father. So I don't know where all the second string information had came from. Unless it's from the other person. But what I did yesterday may have been "out of hand" in your eyes. Sure, that's understandable. I have no clue about these things you think I don't know you know, because there's nothing to hide. That's ass backwards. Do I owe you anything? Do I not for the most part let you say your peace? Do I not lend YOU an ear as well? No, I don't owe you anything. Yes, I ALWAYS let you say your peace. And yes, I ALWAYS lend an ear. Whether or not you capitalize on it is on you. Otherwise, let me restate something. You appease to the circle. Which is alright, but bitching about how you hate it so much then flagrantly speaking to those people makes no sense. I know that's a tad hypocritical from my standpoint with the ex(es) situation. Naw, it isn't. ANYWAY... after this I hope things for the most part are cleared up. You're MOST LIKELY disappointed in me. Can't say I care too much, that's nothing new around these regions. I'm aware my mood changes, but it's nowhere near as drastic you ever portray. Things happen to affect my mood, two nights ago for example. Let me close this chapter though, I did want you around. But I suppose this is for the best.

Square two - rinse & repeat.
Oh you wonderful beings you. You are all actually a joy to converse with individually. But when in a group, it's more of a hell. If you're not aware, everyone is connected in a relationship circle where everyone is shared and loves everyone else. You know who I'm talking about, and if you don't... then you're either extremely dense OR not in the circle. Either way, be glad you don't know what I'm inferring to. But I digress, this whole circle is tiring and unfortunately I'm going to have to step out of this bitch. I don't enjoy the vast amounts of gossip that comes my way. I dislike having my business blabbed around by chicks I thought were cool. I dislike knowing my ex knows my business from shit that happened 2 years ago because someone she's connected to in this love decagon also knows me. It's really redundant. It was interesting for a while, but it's not for me. All of you can kindly go bend over, lube up, and slide a gigantic plum up your asses. Because I'm not doing this shit any longer. Ignore it if you want, talk about me, blah blah. Because I know it will still be a topic of discussion in your gossip circle long after I ghost.

Square three - menthol & formaldehyde are made of heaven.
The ex-girlfriends. We had good runs! Until you either cheated on me, left me for another dude, lost interest, or went crazy. No exaggerations here, I'm not you. But whether you were bi-polar, a sucker for niggas who were disloyal to you, or you felt the need to ghost out with no rhyme or reason. This goes out to you! I know you read this on a daily basis, which is pretty stalker-ish. No worries! I'm not angry at that. I am angry at the fact you still call me though. Santana, it was a one-time deal. Let's keep it that way. Aliciana, you're psychotic, your father does not love you, and you have a gigantic nose. There will never be a relationship in the future between me & you, so go back to the boy you went to after you shitted on me and get cheated on again. Ok? It's all love though. And to all the others. Cecily, it was nice talking to you the other night. But I could really give two shits less you're engaged and you have a kid. Thanks for rubbing the salt in the wound. Maria/Gloria, whatever you go by now, have a nice time in San Diego or San Francisco... whereEVER you are now. Just don't fucking call me. All in all, our relationship is over (each & every one of you), so the phone calls should be too. I really despise having to change my number and e-mail addresses.

Whew.

And that's that.

Have any questions or comments? You know where to leave them.
And you know where to find me. Except, I did purge every messenger list I have, as well as cell phone. Hope you found this enlightening. You can call this predictable, however you see it.

But a nigga really can't give a shit at this point.

Holler.

Upsilon

2008-07-07T17:50:00.003-05:00

Hi hypocrites!

See, mayn. I knew I was right to just cut people off for the remainder. But no, look what I did. Nigga went and tried to open up, and let people in the circle yet & still then only to get shitted on.

Eh, that's life I suppose.

Should've stuck to my master plan. But I'm too nice to stick to that shit. Fuck it.

Just for the record, mood swings aren't the case. I understand the mood changes, and you're like "wtf weren't you just chill like 5 hours ago?". Yeah, I was. Until I'm sitting in the backseat instead of the passenger. Like, you say you don't run your mouth about this & that. But then you proclaim you talk to C about it. Uh, what? You want me to express my thoughts, but you don't reciprocate. Uh, what? You say I have sick mood swings, but did you ever think it could be something effecting those actions. Nawl, you didn't.

Either or, I am extremely tired of it. It's like I'm sitting here with everyone expecting me to flip out on some shit, and I'm just chillin'. Then when erryone gets together in the circle and I'm on some exclusive shit, niggas call me this that and the third. Like my ears aren't burnin'.

Please B, please. Spare me this ONCE.

Sure, my mood did switch. Was it unprovoked? Notatall.

Why even bring up the whole exes ordeal? I am VERY aware I shouldn't be keeping any of them around. But if you hadn't noticed, or remembered from the various time I've expressed at least this. If there isn't a bare minimum of answered calls on my end, at least from Aliciana, I get 50 tons of bullshit I don't want to deal with. Do I want her back? No. She wants me back. Do I want to talk to her? LOL, fuck no. But I do it so I don't have to deal with the extra torments she has up her sleeve. Did I expect Santana to call me? No, but she did. I mean, c'mon. This is miniscule at best, and half of the reasons I even keep Aliciana around are justified by induction.

And now you're bringing up the break-up. Don't want to be around a dude that half ass wants to be with you, or not at all. Ok, there you have it. Everyone is SIMPLE to erase. In fact, It's just been done.

To be honest, I'm tired of the circle as well. But the story you fucking wrote to me through an e-mail was about a BLINDSIDE as my getting angry over shit you did last night and not telling you what happened. To be honest, shit was going to blow over due to the fact I can deal with it MYSELF. No, I don't need to explain anything to you. No, you don't have to explain anything to me. But god dammit, if things will be better just you over there, and me over here, so be it.

I'm really tired, and it's been a stupid long day so far.

I know I'm going to be talked about tonight, and the following weeks to come, but who really gives a fuck?

So when the ROADS shit drops, I'll look back on this and remind myself I need to open up my blogspot to all viewers for a week. I mean, if I'm still remembered then. I wasn't remembered last night, so I highly fucking doubt it.

Glad I watched Venture Bros. semi-alone. Even though Cecily was on the phone, that shit was bittersweet. I mean, it's been almost 7 years. I don't even know how she got my number. Maybe she's tied into the circle somehow as well? Either way, all we talked about was how great her life was. Like seriously, go kill yourself. Woohoo, you have a kid now with another dude. Congratulations?

I was going to fucking say something to remind myself, but I fucking forgot.

OH, Mai, you say you hate this little circle or whatever that is clearly present, but the people you most communicate with are in fact the stabilizing factors of this whole joint. I don't UNDERSTAND how you could say one thing and do another AT ALL TIMES. Maybe that's why I don't really open up to you, I mean honestly. I can't sit here and tell everything I truly want to say to someone with such ass backward viewpoints. Keep flip-flopping and you'll give Obama's stance on Iraq and occupational change a run for it's money.

ANYWAY, I'm done ranting. This is really just a fucking reminder. For when I do fuck up and call people like, "Yeah, I didn't mean to do that".

Because I truly do mean it this time. Peace EVERYONE.

Have a nice life, I'll see you on the flipside.

Tau

2008-07-06T23:07:00.003-05:00

Ultra Gay

Enough said.

Sigma

2008-07-03T17:04:00.007-05:00

Don't ask me how I stumbled on this video, but I did.

Hitomi Tanaka

I don't even know what to say. I was sitting here in amazement for the complete duration of the video at LEAST five times. This video is NOT for the faint of heart. Wow, it's just SO mesmerizing. Let me go buy this plane ticket to Japan reallllll quick.

It's just so amazing.

Like, I get hypnotized every time I click my blog. Haha, oh goddddddddd.

I can't wipe this fucking smile off my face, this shit is priceless.

You all can thank me later, I mean seriously. If you don't comment and thank me for this, I will be disappointed. Not because of the lack of comments, but the sheer amount of niggas missing out on this. I mean, this can be appreciated by BOTH sexes! Oh man.

EDIT: Oh wow...

Why oh why must I have stumbled across this?!

Shoot me now, I think I'm in love.

Whoever that nigga behind the camera is, is mad lucky.
No doubt.

God help me. ='(

Rho

2008-07-02T11:39:00.008-05:00

Mayn, let me hop that bandwagon.

Sike naw, I birthed this business, look at my track record.

Introduction to HAZE

The R.O.A.D.S. mixtape is the official name. Planning on 13 tracks. May shorten or expand with time. Whatever I feel. Tentative for November 2008.

The Revival of A Dying Season Tape

She Loves Me
Falling Skies
Easy
Damsels In Distress
Never Grow Old
Sky High
Missing Me
Soliloquy
Global
Remember The Times
Flow Like Water
Crashing Down
I Love Her Not

I'm sitting here STUPID tired though, the 360 is supposedly coming in today. If not today, then tomorrow. Class in 35 minutes, I'm trying to prepare myself for super boredom.
EDIT: The 360 is so in my lap.

And that story about this morning is true, and I got more vivid detail than that! I just figured I'd cut it short just so you niggas don't nod off to my voice. Seriously.

Ain't shit else really... but frillz though.

What are you getting me for my birthday? You got less than 2 weeks.

Maybe a couple of these???

Or one or two of these???

Mmmmmmmmmmmmoannnnn @ Colombian women.

Look at all the boobies! Wowzers.

Just make sure it gets to STL on time if you're sending one of them!

Peace.

Pi

2008-06-28T07:21:00.004-05:00

It's all in my goddamn mind. And it comes sick piece, by sick piece. And I'm forming this masterpiece in my head. I have so much flying through my mind right now, I just have to write it down. Like my latest joint, I'm seriously debating putting that shit on private right now just so it's a HUGE surprise for when I drop it.

EDIT: Done, heh. Sorry.

Easily one of the biggest projects I've ever been EXCITED to delve into, and complete. This is where it's at, and I have SO much to say. Peep game when I start leaking a couple tracks. It's over.

Anyway, quick rundown.

Nawwww, let me save that for later.

Start the snowflake rolling downhill on one of the Himalayas. Keep the anticipation building. All I can say is... may I ALWAYS be blunt.

Oh, and SHE has the VOICE I need. Just just just just just WAIT for it! I can't even wait for it.

She is going to be the make for this tape. Her voice is what I've been fiending! And it's only after I browse around for HOURS on end until I find exactly what I need beat-wise and/or inspiration to write. So if the tape is delayed, single-handedly blame her and her GENIUS. Fuck.

Not only her, but also him -

I can't throw half ass written joints on HIS beats. Or with HER vocals in the backdrop. It's just NOT possible. So expect things you've NEVER read, heard, or been blessed with as of yet.

If you know who these people are, get ready. This is no joke to me, true story.

Sorry to hype this shit up, but I'll going to go ahead and do it... don't get mad at me! I'm going to go ahead and slate the release for sometime near Nov '08. Don't take that as a solid time, but I'm gunning for that right now. Do or die.

Oh, and watch out for Flow Like Water.

Omicron

2008-06-26T23:14:00.009-05:00

Amazing shit, I cried when I saw this. That means it'll be back in my arms within a week. Which also means I'll be less bored throughout the day! Good shit, because I missed you baby! When you were gone it hurt my heart!

But cheah, The bitches that deserved to go home today on SYTYCD left. That black girl Chelsie is mad arrogant. Glad she got the shit put into perspective.

ABDC was mediocre. I have a feeling Super Cr3w will be around for a while, and I highly dislike them. Their trick factor will wear out quick, just like Status Quo of yesteryear. SoReal & Supreme Soul, ehhhhh. Good but shit just wasn't like BLAOBLAOBLAO like usual. It's whatever though, those two aren't going ANYWHERE. Take my word for it.

Woke up mad late today, felt like I was a nigga for real. Woke up at 4:30 PM. Yeah, I know. MAD niggerish. But I had a long night, you can ask Mai about that ;l;lasmdkaplsjdiopajd'jdopajdpj'oad;sdal;k;lsd LMFAO. Yeah, just ask her.

Watched this Future Weapons joint on the Discovery Channel and it was crazy interesting. Maybe it's because I like guns, maybe. Went over the Panzer Howitzer, the Corner-Shot, X-75 Stealth Jet (replacement for the Harrier), and the Javelin. They also did another special the hour afterwards... didn't get to watch it. Glad I recorded it!

LONG day in store for me tomorrow. Not only do I have to make a trip up to Edwardsville to make an appointment so I can come BACK up there next week to talk to a counselor about scheduling classes and applying for the Law branch of the college; but also have to a ass ton of errands for pops tomorrow NOT to be specified in this reading. You may get a call from me tomorrow bitching about this work I'll have to do... so don't be surprised.

I hope it rains HEAVY tomorrow, and I hope the maids come early so I wake up at a proper time. 4:30 PM is NOT the business. Bleh, we'll see what's good though. I just need to get back on track, not to mention writing the rest of my final draft of the critique I did on Ronald Takaki's essay: The Harmful Myth of Asian Superiority.

YEAHHH, you read that right!

Want a copy of the rough draft? COMMENT ME, lawlz.

One last thing... political views. Everyone has them to SOME extent. And I'm not going to touch up on mine just this instant. But everyone should vote on what is best for their INDIVIDUAL outlook (i.e. which candidate is going to help YOU out in the long run, etc.). Not just based on race, because trust me. I guarantee half of you don't even know what Obama stands for.

SMH, and this shit makes me cry. Only because I KNOW this is what the outcome is going to be in November, and it hurts my heart. Wtf does "CHANGE!!!" even mean? NOONE knows son, NOONE. Niggas have NO clue what they're doing.

SMMFH.

Xi

2008-06-25T22:14:00.002-05:00

"I still feel that there's niggas that owe me checks
I still feel like there's bitches that owe me sex
I feel like this but niggas don't know me stressed
I lost the only girl in the world that knows me best"

Man, long ass day. Especially ending last night with this Chinese bitch trying to get me to say I love her on the telephone. Jesus, hoes are fiending now days. Get a grip on reality, I'm a grown man, I don't play those games. I guess that's why she's attempting to cut off all communication off with me now. Because I won't bow to her every whim. Real fucking shame, I guess bitches in this era don't know the what the word "no" means.

Anyway, woke up groggy as hell like usual. Planned on doing my two page paper mad early. I said fuck that shit and drove to class half asleep after my shower. Walked into my English class and a nigga forgot to do his rough draft for his critique. Didn't matter much, not like Mr. O takes grades on drafts. Blah.

Classic shit today though.

The SAGA of the See-saw: America's Only Downfall.

Apparently Mr. O believes the lack of See-saws, Flying Jennies, and metal slides in America's elementary school playgrounds directly contributes to the vast amount of idiots running around in the country today. Something along the lines of those various playground equipments teaching VALUABLE lessons. In example, see-saws implemented TEAMWORK, and not in the way you're thinking right now. "If a bully asked you to get on the see-saw with him, you always knew not to! Because he's going to jump off the see-saw when you're at your peak and it'll hurt! Either that, or you had FRIENDS that looked out for you on the playground. Or, you got some kid stupid enough to go on the see-saw with you, so you can do it to them! THAT employed critical thinking skills. You know when a kid hasn't ever experienced a see-saw when he's walking around like a cracked out dopey dwarf on a cell phone talking 500,000 decibels louder than he needs to on campus... and really ANYWHERE!" I can't help but to agree. Good thing I had that playground equipment. Too bad we're leaving our future in the hands of kids with plastic slides it takes 30 minutes to go down, and ball pits. WHAT HARM DO THOSE BRING? WHAT LESSONS DO THOSE TEACH KIDS? Nothing, fuck the bullshit.

That gave me QUITE a laugh in class.

Otherwise, shit was a standard day. My Political Science teacher is a astute Democrat, which makes him a complete retard in my eyes. He asked a rhetorical question today along the lines of this...

"What should we do about immigrants crossing the border? I mean, should we shoot them as they cross?"

Me being the opinionated dick I am, raised both of my hands with the thumbs-up signal. He looked in my back corner of the classroom stunned for about 3 minutes, with NOTHING to say. Got quite a laugh out of that one too. I say shoot the fuckers. America isn't for you, trust me. You can go pick berries in Mexico for 20 pesos a day, you'll be making the same viable amount in America, except you guys have uglier women. Now skedaddle.

SYTYCD was alright. I want to fuck Chelsea Hightower.

Not the BEST picture, but you see what I mean. She could DEFINITELY get it. If I were her partner on the show, I'd be tapping that multiple times a day.

Ehhh, nothing much else to report. Still writing, looking at mics. Still looking for a new job.

That's 'bout it.

Nu

2008-06-23T16:49:00.005-05:00

I swear, Venture Bros. cheers me up every time I'm down. Last night's episode had me in tears. Homicidal midgets mixed with grown men dressed in butterfly costumes always makes for legendary comedy. Not even to mention the "To Don't List" line. Had me DYING.

My bornday is coming up! Nigga, bet that. July 15, 1988 is the exact date. July 14, if you're going by Central Time Zones, or American for that matter. So I've been trying to brainstorm shit I want... not only to get myself, but for other people around the internal & extended family to pick up. I do need a new phone, but I figure I'll be getting that within the next 7 days or so. And trust me on this one, it WILL happen.

Nas' Untitled album drops on my birthday son! He picked the perfect day, and I mos DEF will be picking that joint up.

"Fried chicken, fly vixen....."

Still don't know what I want to do for the 15th, but who knows? I'll probably still be recovering from the drinking that'll be going on the Saturday prior. That'll be an interesting turn-out. I hope that Saturday is easy going, because I won't be up for bullshit. Especially since it's a wedding, in the middle of Hickville, TN. Shame.

So, talked with ma dukes. Seems a ZUNE is out of range. Which is ass, because that's the only thing I really want. A new 360 is def. out of the question. So I figure I'm going to propose FL8.

Man, hold up, I just went to their website.

Full package is 400 bones. Ugh, maybe I'll ask for a mic then. And I'll pick up the FL8 after I get this job. That shit may/WILL delay the mixtape, which also sucks. I have the thirst to record.

It's a SEXY 400 presidents though.

Was just looking at Pro Tools right now, and I can't even find a definitive price for that.

Guaranteed that shit is even more expensive. Anyway, I have GRAND ideas for the tape. Just need to get the equipment I need to get the project off the ground.

-sigh

It's whatever though, I suppose it's an eventual process.

Speaking of jobs, I have to harass the people I'm applying to tomorrow. And I have to schedule an appointment for the SIUE counselors tomorrow. Need to get my schedule set up so I know where my leeway time is throughout the week in the fall.

I keep going back & forth with the tape name. Either...

Then She Said Hello.
July's Very Own.

And the concepts I have for both are just so, so, so sick. I actually listened to the N.E.R.D album in it's entirety today, and I judged it before I actually listened to the tracks. The best joint on there in my eyes is the Sooner Or Later jawn. I'll be biting that on the tape, no disrespect. I'm leaning toward the latter name by the way, and may stick with it. Anyway, now I'm just rambling. But keep a look out, I'll be trying to keep people posted. I mean, if they read this blog.

Ahhhhhhh, ghawdam... I ran out of my Newports just a few minutes ago, and what I cooked is finally ready. So I'll go 'head and eat then get some new cancerous agents.

Get at me.

Mu

2008-06-22T10:27:00.005-05:00

I had a near death experience at around 7:15 AM this morning.

Let me set this scenario up for you.

I woke up at around 11:00 PM last night, haven't slept since. Been fiddling around with some shit. Got on the phone, etc. So I finally decide and say to myself, "Hey self, why not get ready for church early this Sunday? Do something different, yenno?". So I did. And with nothing else to do but ponder on life, I went outside to retrieve a Newport and proceed to light it up. All was well, pacing back and forth, looking at the horizon & rising sun from the east. WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN. Three birds, pigeon type of birds come barreling from the side of my house. Two pigeon birds, fly off on a different course. One heads straight for me.

At this point, I have my Newport in my mouth, all I want is to smoke. Maybe enjoy it for once. But no, this bitch-ass bird decides to try and Jihad my shit. So I'm looking at this bird, and I'm just standing there in shock that this nigga is bold enough to fly right at me. So at the last second I drop my right shoulder back, and get on some Matrix 2 shit, and avoid the bird by a hair.

Man, if I stayed in that position... the bitch could've seriously punctured something. He was heading straight for my throat. He's lucky I didn't just hit him out of my air space. You live to see another day, you Muhammed Al-Shir Rasheed Amir ass mother fucker.

Anyway, went to church. Typical shit as always.
One saying stood out to me though:

"Walk by faith, not by signs."

I know, it's mad cliche'. But it's true. And it's making me rethink my whole last two day experience. I don't know.

Let me contemplate it some more, I'll get back to you.

EDIT: Still contemplating it. But I put a temp. banner up. Doesn't portray what I'm trying to get across in it's entirety, but it works. I also am thinking I need to rework my playlists, may work on that some more and come through with another edit/update.

Ehhhh, we'll see.

Lambda

2008-06-21T15:57:00.004-05:00

"The scars of the past will soon be soothed by a passionate new love."

God, you son of a bitch. Don't play with me like this.

Got this fortune after cracking open a fortune cookie at a Chinese buffet I strolled through today just because I was hungry. Three cookies on the table to choose from and I just so happen to pick that one up out of three. I mean, 33% chance I suppose to pick it. But then again, the chances of it being that fortune are even worse.

I don't know, just don't play with me Jehovah. Just don't do it.
I don't have the time, willingness, or effort to keep these games up.

I guess "soon" we'll see.

Kappa

2008-06-21T05:21:00.005-05:00

At this point I'm asking God, "Why?".

It doesn't make any sense. Why would He bring this back? I mean, who is fucking next? Going to bring Liz back to rub it in my face? Maybe Jocelyn? Nina? Alexia? Or maybe you'd bring Maria back, just to throw the salt on the wound.

Why not God? Why fucking not?

Tonight around 2:15 AM, I got a call from someone I haven't heard from in going on two years. I would've really rather preferred it to last forever. But no, wishful thinking always fails. I'm forever shitted on. This is no pity party, this is a historical recount of the bullshit God puts ME through.

Fuck your TESTS. Fuck your trials & errors. Fuck your recollections. And FUCK your way of thinking. Your whole style is bullshit. How about bringing a streak of KARMA my way? How about stopping all the bullshit "mapped out plan", and show me a clear goddamn sign that THIS shit you're doing now is going to stop VERY fucking soon.

Because when you bring me across an ex-girlfriend that HURT me, it's not all dandelions and fucking roses. ESPECIALLY when it's SANTANA. And for 3 fucking hours we discussed shit. And she talked about how she STILL has that letter, and STILL has that bag, and STILL STILL STILL has my number lying around. Is this some sort of twisted joke?

She left me for NOTHING. Even admittedly tonight said I did NOTHING wrong for that shit to happen. And what does she go do? Call me to ask how I'm fucking doing? For three hours?

WHAT SENSE ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE HERE?

Am I missing a link? Am I not fully comprehending the situation? There is TOO much emotion built up on this. It's been almost TWO YEARS NOW. Why make your presence known now? Why not make sure I'm fucking okay when you LEFT me? It takes you two years?

And you're EXACTLY right Santana. You're not normal at all for calling me to check to see how I'm doing. I'm fine, live YOUR life. We can't be friends. We can't talk. We can't even write each other. Because YOU demolished that with the shit YOU YOU YOU did. Not me, NEVER me.

I'm in the RIGHT here. It's NATURAL to resent what another person does to you, when it's of the CALIBRE you acted upon me.

Just LEAVE me be. Because you apparently can't love me.

And to the day I die, I'll know I was too good for you. At least to be true, in the fantasy world you live in. And honestly, in most women's. Yeah, most women's.

And now I'm sitting here, wondering when God will stop throwing curve balls. And thusly, when I'll begin to start expecting these pitches at ALL times. Because right now, I'm swinging and I'm steady missin'.

FUCK YOU God.

Fuck... man, why? Why YOU of everyone that can fuck me over?

Why?

Iota

2008-06-20T15:21:00.005-05:00

As I'm eating my BBQ Bacon Sirloin burger & curly fries from Jack In The Box, listening to Alvin & The Chipmunk's version of I Luv Your Girl, and reruns of last night's ABDC... I can't help but think, this is a perfect time for an update.

Man, look at shawty roll!

Yesterday!

Man, yesterday. Carmine got me on that political topic. And we talked for quite a while about the shit. US concentration camps being refurnished. Interesting to say the least. Not to mention the biometric ID system Bush pushed back on 6/6/06 to be able to ID immigrants/foreigners and then further expand it. Mark of the Beast controversy. Don't know if I'm totally in belief, but whatever.

Then we started talking about oil prices, and OPEC. Showed Carmine Dubai. Lmfao, nigga was pissed. How they produce 240k barrels of oil a day, and we get raped for gas over here. I showed him these three pictures of Dubai in 1991, 2005, and 2008. Astonishing shit (look below).

Best part of this is, NYC took 40 years to get a skyline like THIS. It has taken them 17 years (1991 in the first photograph, to 2008 in the last photograph). I still say we drill a hole in fucking Alaska and use our own oil and boost our OWN economy.

And I pray that y'all ain't serious,
Because seriously she's on my dick.

So You Think You Can Dance was disappointing. As was America's Best Dance Crew. thrashed everyone on ABDC. And to be truthful, if it isn't Supreme Soul, SoReal, and A.S.I.I.D. in the final 3, I'm boycotting the show. As for SYTYCD, the wrong people left. Bleh.

Call it envy, I want her on me
All up in my head, now she in my bed like
Ahhhh, ah, ah ahhhh!

STILL in search of a new job, need some money. I've got bills and shit. School on Monday, and visiting my 4-year college tomorrow. I guess I need to stop procrastinating as far as registering for these two classes up there. We'll see what happens, I guess I'll just keep applying for jobs, and keep my mindset on school.

Damn, she bad. Damn, she bad.
I love your girl.

Theta

2008-06-18T21:54:00.005-05:00

Woke up a hour and a half late for class. Thanks for that wake-up call Mai. Too bad that call never came back 10 minutes later.

So, now I have to find a way to turn in my summary paper that I COMPLETED to my professor without getting too much of a deduction. Fucking horrible.

And yes, Mai. I am extremely ticked off at you. And have been for a WHILE now. "You've been mean to me recently, stop it!" No shit? Would it have to deal with the fact, you think name-calling is cute? I don't know how many fucking times I've expressed I don't like being called a liar, yet you still like to call me one. I don't know HOW many times I've asked you to stop calling me a ho, yet you still do it. Then it gets to the point I call you a Chink cunt-licking bitch, and I'm the one in the wrong. Or even calling me a faggot. I can't believe you actually have the nerve to come at ME like that. Then call me an emotionless dick over the shit I say to you.

GET WITH THE FUCKING PROGRAM.

Spare a nigga, please.
You try to shit on me? I'm shitting on you thirty times harder.

That's a huge hypocrite move, and I hope you realize it by the time you figure the shit out for yourself. I mean, really, is it THAT hard to spot?

Whether it be on your Y! status, in a conversation with you (on or off the phone), or in a blog. It's always the same matter, and has been for the past 3 or so weeks. Please, I can't give you a clearer hint than the ones I've been giving you. Pick up on it already.

By the way, Juelz, I really do hate you. And don't worry, it's not just because you're a two-faced bitch. But because you're in this loopy lust circle that I'm apparently caught in, along with a few others.

Actually ALOT of others.

Carmine
Liz
Drey
Santana
Eric
Aliciana
Jay
Derek
Mai

I'm sure I'm forgetting a PLETHORA of people.

Like Carmine said yesterday, the shit is mad ridiculous. And you niggas are all acting feminine. SUPER feminine. Go find some MaxiPads, bitches.

So I mean, don't feel bad. It's pretty much universal. By the way, I heard you dated a female before. Therefore making you a cunt-licking bitch too. Maybe you and your "best internet friend" Mai can go work something out.

For fuck sake.

SPARE me.

Eta

2008-06-18T03:01:00.004-05:00

Lol, Amiya! Can't believe you're back love. Where you been at? Don't say some Olive Garden shit, because I know you been doing some OTHER OTHER shit. You can't sing by the way, trusttttt.

That's my guh though, she cool as hell.

Man, wtf did I do today? Ain't shit but sleep. Mow the lawn. Buy some Newport Lights. Look at my articles for my summary that's due in 5 hours. Hah.

Me and Ace had a talk today, I need to head up to the CHI. Bless this nigga with my presence. Look for me on a track soon! Trusttttt.

Spoke with Carmine today. Nigga is TOO funny. Don't EVER get us together in the same room, shit will go DOWN. Two cool niggas with the same train of thought. Oh god, that's a collision course for comedy. Sorry to hear about your trouble with wifey though! Just know that other nigga is on some serious female shit, mayn, you should ALREADY know from that story I told you.

Otherwise, a nigga certainly has been writing en mass. I'mma use a TON a beats from Nujabes. Don'thit me with any copyrright fees! You know I love your shit, mayn. Just call it an artist collaboration! I'll certainly put your name on the mixtape credits!

Tentative title for the mixtape right now is: And Then She Said Hello.

Don't ask what it means yet, it'll all be revealed and understood when you listen!

Otherwise, that's about it. Class tomorrow then I'm back to my writing and beginning my transit into the mixtape realm. Pray for me. I know, I know. Just do it.

Lol @ Amiya again. Shorty is too sexy, I swear she could have my babies.

May write about her here and there too. Don't be TOO surprised. Something like "Blues". Yeah, I like that... Blues.

She was light-skinned, a fine tint
Horrible skills in time management
But she's SO sincere, always had her hair did
Black girl at heart, and I don't even like that type of bitch

Lmfao, let me STOP! She cool. I'm not using that by the way.
So go 'head! Bite away.

Zeta

2008-06-16T22:53:00.004-05:00

It's been a while. Yes; yes it has.

So much, with so little time to put my thoughts in a correct order. So let's base this one on the women that play SOME role in my life. Major, or minor. Doesn't matter. Alphabetical order, let's make shit fair.

Aliciana.

You're truly a bitch. And when I use that word, I mean every definition, every slang term/usage. You are truly the dirtiest of the dirty. I don't understand your way of thinking in the least bit, and I most definitely don't understand how you justify your ways of thinking in your little pecan sized bi-polar brain. But it just so happens, everything that pertained with me, you have some impossible excuse and have it filed under the "Fuck Noah" section. Well, cheers to you. Can we finally realize the fact that when we were STILL on that level, and we both know what level we were on, don't play dumb bitch. That you were talking to another dude, point blank period. Nice going pulling a Santana. You hit a home run there. And the funniest thing is, in Santana fashion, you followed through the whole way. And even got cheated on in the end. Yeah, life's a bitch. As are you, you assless freak.

Elisa.

To be honest, everything with you IS awkward. From you telling me you could never see me as anything more than a friend. To then going against what you had said a week prior and telling me you could see us doing relationship things, but not being in a relationship. THEN telling me you really did love me. I mean, c'mon make up your fucking mind. (Did I mention hiding you were with a dude? It wasn't THAT major, but come the fuck on Theodora.) I did want you at a point in time. Actually for the LONGEST time. But let's be honest here. You're as big a slut as the next girl. Sure, you don't go around fucking every dude you see. But you let every dude you're "feeling" into your Billionaire Boys Club skinny jeans, or whatever the fuck you wear now days. It's like you were real as fuck. Then turned into a poser. I don't know, maybe I'm the one in the wrong here. Hell naw, fuck that.

Mai.

Not ready for a relationship with you again or at all, we really shouldn't be talking in the way we do at night. REGARDLESS. That's all I have to fucking say about that.

The Masses.

Jessica, Laura, Brittney, Ashlee, Ashley, Sondra, & Alysha. You all did one major thing wrong. And that was be too easy. So pack your bags, leave me the fuck alone. Last thing I need is a bitch to play with her pussy on the first night and let me hear her moan. I didn't ask for it, and I certainly didn't initiate the shit. Just let me be. You, and ME... It won't ever happen. In ANY lifetime.

I guess that sums up the emotions on those subjects. They're just really confusing. I guess I'm just frustrated over shit that's happened because Elisa and Aliciana came back. And there are tons of mixed feelings about their situations. Like everything is all jolly and good, when it's really not. I hate that acting shit.

Anyway, I won't be writing about my Aunt. I figure I have all the information I need. If anything will be written, it'll be in cadence. Otherwise, those things are not meant to be discussed.

And to my god daughter, Emoni. You frog-faced fuck, you know I love you. And if another guy is hitting you or your moms. Just let me know. And the same thing will happen to the last guy that did it, ok? Dre, you delay shit too much B.

I guess, I'll check back in...

"It truly is awkward... trust me it has been!
I mean it has been a while, or to you am I a has-been?"

Epsilon

2008-06-13T23:30:00.002-05:00

Mournful day. The weather fit the occasion. As did the mood and numeral of date, for the most part. Rainy, torrent type of business. Hah, Friday the 13th. Same mindstate.

Today was my Aunt's funeral in California. I woke up to dogs barking. Easily signifying the maids. Got up, dressed in my bummy clothes, hair all slanted over to one side due to how I sleep. Smoked a few.

Decided when I got back home I'd go to the movie theatre to see The Happening. Hadn't realized movies were so expensive to see. Haven't been to one in so long. I only ever go to the movies solo. I can't stand company at the movies, it defeats the purpose of going to the movies, in my opinion. But overall, a good movie. But that's my opinion. Kinda figured out the reason for the events occurring early on in the movie. You just have to think about it.

I guess I'm making a few exceptions as far as the plan. "Slow Construction" stages. Since Elisa, Mai, and Liz have been a few I've been able to open up to. It helps. More than they'd ever know.

Talked to my mother today, details are still sketchy. I guess we'll see when I start contacting them for correct information.

Cooked today, lasagna. It was alright. At least I know I can fend for myself when parentals are half a continent away. Gives me a sense of responsibility I could get used to.

LIVE is still working, thank God. Need a new phone. I figure I'll be writing my lament tomorrow. It just FEELS right. I hope it's of a proper remembrance of her. I hope.

Anyway, adjusting the plan, hopefully this works one half step by one.

Delta

2008-06-12T18:30:00.004-05:00

So, today has been a long. Tedious. Frustrating. Irritating. Inconceivable day.

I took my parents to the airport. They'll be back on Sunday. Drove their car back to the house, after a little detour to Dorsett. Nice place I suppose, but I digress. Came home and pulled into the garage. Turned the car off, went inside. A hour of so later, want to smoke, and it's amazing. But I locked the car keys inside the car. To make things worse, I don't have a phantom key for that car.

Fucking amazing.

So not only are my Newports and lighter in there, but also my new CDs, my PSP, my phone, and my pride. Why isn't there a spare key for that fucking car? Jesus F. Christ.

Moving along, the rest of the day hasn't been all cheery either. Granted, thank God I locked my phone in that car. Now I won't be tempted. But the XBOX 360. Oh, man... the fucking XBOX 360. On Sunday, my brother got his new computer. He only had one ethernet cable in his room, so I take the 360 downstairs to mine. REMEMBER, the XBOX 360 was working perfectly 5 minutes before I took it downstairs. So, I hook it up, A/V cables, ethernet, everything. Turn it on, and the XBOX LIVE does not work. Matter of fact, it's not working right fucking now as I stare at it. I have done EVERYTHING under the motherFUCKING sun to get this bitch ass videogame console to work.

I have been fucking trouble-shooting my feet off my body for the past 5 days. What the fuck.

Switched ethernet cables from the 360 to the switch/router.
Changed ports on the switch/router for the 360.
Power-cycled the modem, router, & switch multiple times.
Placed MANUAL settings into the 360, to no avail.
AUTOMATIC settings leave me with an error as well.
Inserted the 360's MAC address into my router.
Switched settings on the DHCP server, multiple times.
Changed the UPnP settings.
Tried port transferring directly to the LIVE servers.
Connected the 360 directly to the router/switch/modem.
Shut off the router's firewall.
Shut off every computer's firewall.
Factory reset my router.
Updated the firmware.

And on my LAST limb, prayed. None of which worked, especially the last one.

The only errors I get are the following:

If set to pick up the IP address automatically, the IP test fails for the 360. Giving me the half-assed error that, "Your console was unable to negotiate a lease with your DHCP server. Make sure that addresses are available on your server.". And turst me, there are over a hundred addresses it can fucking choose.
If set to pick up the IP address manually, the IP test fails for the 360. Giving me the bullshit error that, "Your gateway could not respond to your network request.". That is total horse shit. I set up a fucking MAC address on the router, and everytime the 360 is online, it shows the static IP for the fucking XBOX (192.168.1.120) on the DHCP server lease list. Which then fucking counter-pwns the bullshit error the automatic setting is giving me.

I'm running out of fucking options here. Just fucking God, all I want is the LIVE connection to work.

Piece of fucking shit.

EDIT: There is a God; Fix'd!

Gamma

2008-06-11T21:16:00.005-05:00

"Women would walk up to me, they say they wanted my digits
In turn they'd only really get mumbled tagmemics
But they eventually stumbled on me, and fell in love with my lyrics
In truth, all they ever really got are my remnants..."

Gotta save that one for later.

Watched a TON of Kaba Modern, SoReal, Team Millenia, & JabbawockeeZ videos today. And truthfully, every time I watch any one of these crews perform, they inspire me. A EXTRANEOUS amount. They truly make life enjoyable. The movements Lawrence Kao, Tony Tran & Mike Song mess with are truly amazing. Wish I danced THAT good. But I guess that comes with practice. And in reality, they make me wonder if I'm doing what I really enjoy, or pursuing a life I REALLY want.

Deep, I know.

Twitch did work tonight! Glad I'm running with dude for the season. Didn't think the girl from Placentaville would be good, but she rocked it hardcore. Also the couple that did the Mia Michaels routine, extraordinary. Mia Michaels' routines are a feast for my famished eyes. I thank her for that. And the Joshua & Katee couple, whoa. Dude has the FIRE in him. Humble, but arrogant in his moves while on stage. Makes the routines nothing short of perfection.

Just for a recount.

America's Best Dance Crew - SoReal Cru
So You Think You Can Dance? - Twitchington!

Bet that.

"I see the fornication of the lies
All they're doing is dressing as villains in disguise
It's clear to see, so why even ruin their pride?
Playing charades with me;
When they know I'm the realest nigga they'll know in their entire lives..."

EDIT: My phone just gave me the WSOD (White Screen of Death). I guess since even the CHARGER won't charge correctly, this phone is on it's last limb. The same as my first baby. Fuck, I don't want to have to pay for a new phone so soon. Not even to mention my XBOX's network IP address won't connect to my DHCP/router's gateway. Life is a a bitch even in my worst moments. I don't know how she finds shit to tack on, but she ALWAYS does.

Beta

2008-06-11T15:45:00.002-05:00

So concludes most of day two. Can't say I've seen much progress yet, but yet instilled, everything comes with time. And with me, it always comes slower than I ever imagine it being.

Classes are the most trivial of sorts. I have to contemplate which dates I'll want to take my absentee sessions, because those classes really bore the hell out of me. I'm looking through my old school records, and it seems I took an IQ test back in 1st grade. And scored around a 125. Which placed me within the top 5% of the population.

I guess that explains why school has never really interested me. In turn, placed a cause & effect domino system on the events I must've incoherently chosen with my subconscious. Or, just because I was rebelling. Any way you roll the dice, the classes are still severely trivial.

Smoked a bit too much today, also shaved. Haven't had a semi-clean cut face in ages now. Feels fresher. I had one call from the past night when I decided to begin this experiment, to right now. Funniest thing is, it's from the Korean girl way back when that wanted to give me her nudes. Shame.

I've already began a process I call "Destruction". Every list is cleared out of people whom I believe never cared, fronted like they did care, or didn't interest me. Every list. Phone contacts, "messengers", websites, the whole nine. With this, I feel it's a visual reminder that I'm starting anew. Maybe it will work. Who really knows?

Still on the verge of cutting again. It's really trying to go back and forth with yourself, pros & cons, on why I should or shouldn't. But I ultimately spill it, and lose the battle. The alcohol has me to suffer minor hang overs. And the cigarettes are smoked in such a succession that I can feel the arsenic eating away at the tip of my tongue.

So be it.

Remember Noah, stick to the plan. Nothing else has worked yet, maybe this will.

Alpha

2008-06-10T23:23:00.001-05:00

And so begins my new experiment.

I'll be documenting over the upcoming days of progress, thoughts, and ultimately the result.

Hopefully it'll one day make sense.